Friday, May 22, 2020

Random Back Issues #30 - Hourman #23

Wow, Hourman's got the '90s saliva trail going there something fierce.

This is right near the tail end of the Peyer/Morales Hourman series. The Hourman in question, an android from the DC One Million era, has decided to use the last of the fuel in his time ship to take all his friends (and a couple of his villains) on a little vacation through time. How nice.

Having not installed a bathroom on the ship, they pull over in 1954, still in Happy Harbor, where Hourman set up while he was being "mentored" in humanity by Snapper Carr of all people. While everyone else is using the facilities, Hourman assumes his secret identity of "Matthew Tyler", who looks like a '90s slacker/geek type guy. Doesn't exactly blend in, as he and Snapper run afoul of the local police. They're briefly saved by Aubrey Lee, mother of Bethany (Snapper's ex and currently dating Hourman), when she claims to be escorting these prisoners. Only problem is, she introduces herself as chief of police of Happy Harbor. True in 2001, not in 1954, especially since she's talking to the chief of police of 1954's Happy Harbor.
Aubrey beats the crap out of him, revealing he'll eventually be caught by the feds squeezing a school for the blind for protection money, dying broke and alone. He tries to shoot her, but Matthew stops the bullet and Aubrey, well, you see how that ended.

Back in the time ship, Snapper bemoans giving the gas station attendant a gold coin worth $600 to pay for Dave buying a case of beer (that he loves that stopped being made in 1971) and some pre-Code horror comics. Beth points out the money was from his book being published, when Snapper didn't even know that happened. Hourman knows who published it, but refuses to say. He also refuses to check in on his and Beth's future together, until she argues him into it.

Still in Happy Harbor, just 20 years in the future (so about a year from now), most of them drop in on Beth, finding her married not to Hourman, or Snapper, but Gary. Aubrey's useless schulb of a deputy. No one other than Gary seems particularly happy with that reveal. Give the audience what they need, not what they want, I guess. Up on the roof, old Hourman foe Dr. Togg, a demon called Torcher, and Dave's annoying teenage son Sticky are plotting a mutiny. Togg and Torcher because they're bad guys, I guess. Sticky because he's pissed they haven't left Happy Harbor yet. He wanted to see Woodstock '94!
I didn't even know there was a Woodstock '94. I just know the original one and the late-90s one, where everyone blames Limp Bizkit for a crowd of drunk idiots deciding to break and burn shit. Speaking as someone who has (unwillingly) gone to a lot of parties involving drunk people, they don't need encouragement to break shit. Anyway, Hourman's got Amazo's skull on his time ship like a hood ornament, and they're going to reactivate it. Definitely nothing that can go wrong with that plan.

And in the 853rd Century, the original Hourman is there running Tyler ChemoRobotics (then returning to his time with his memories erased), and gets a visit from Batman 1,000,000. He tries to fight him, but gets dosed with something that cancels the effects of Miraclo, but also 'paralyzes your psychological defenses against challenging new ideas.' OK, sure. Despite the Justice Legion A agreeing to leave their Hourman be, Batman is still spying on him, and he's not happy. He's Batman, no matter the time or universe, he's never happy. He tells Rex that the android let a cop be assaulted (leaving out it was by another cop, all versions of Batman also apparently being dishonest cocks), and Rex concludes he needs to scrap him.

The book only has two issues left after this, which involve android Hourman giving Original Recipe Hourman some much-needed peace, and the android and Snapper going their separate ways as Hourman rushes off to fight Amazo one more time.

[6th longbox, 61st comic. Hourman #23, by Tom Peyer (writer), Rags Morales (penciler), Dave Meikis (inker), John Kalisz (colorist), Kurt Hathaway (letterer)]

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