Peter is depressed because his current girlfriend broke up with him. I have no idea who that would have been in 2012, so whatever. Peter webs up some loser trying to rob a joint and that is the only moment he'll manage even mild competency for the rest of the issue.
The Black Cat appears on the fire escape and Peter tries (pitifully) to flirt. You've already seen how that goes. Felicia reaches her hideout and after a shower, discovers a spider-tracer on her costume. Then the cops bust in. No, he didn't actually put a tracer on her, it's part of a larger plot by shadowy organizations.
Next morning, Peter is late for a meeting at Horizon Labs. Oh yeah, I dimly recall that being part of his status quo for a hot minute. But work is canceled, because there was a theft of some hologram-projecting phone, by the Black Cat. Caught on camera, no less. Setting aside how uncharacteristically sloppy that is, she was deflecting Peter's weak game at the same time, so he knows something's not right. Time for a jailbreak!
OK, never mind, she's got that handled. Time to consult a legal professional! Failing that, talk to Matt Murdock, in the middle of his cat-and-mouse game with Kirsten McDuffie about whether he's Daredevil or not.
They meet up later at the Chrysler Building, so Spidey can lose a game of suicide fall chicken (or whatever you want to call it) to Daredevil. I know, "Man Without Fear," but Spidey is "Guy with vastly superior speed, strength and reflexes that would enable him to pull off moves Murdock couldn't on the best day of his life." I know this is "pretending to not be depressed" Murdock, and Waid's writing that book so he's going to make his boy shine, but come on. How the fuck does Daredevil, the universe's litter box, always manage to make Spider-Man the Daffy Duck to his Bugs Bunny? Every damn time.
Spidey suggests they go question the scientist whose hologram phone was swiped, but they find him being held hostage by a bunch of armed guys. Or do they? DD's radar sense says no one is there, and Spidey forgot the hologram-projecting phone that got stolen makes really good holograms. I wouldn't mind Daredevil being the one to easily see through the deception there if not for the entire rest of the issue making Spider-Man look like a hapless dope.
Dropping into the tunnel the armed guys used, Spider-Man is sure something is still up, because his spider-sense wouldn't go off if there had been nothing dangerous. Are you sure? Maybe you've just got indigestion, or it's warning you forgot to pay the electric bill.
Once in the tunnel, it is (of course) Daredevil who senses the trap and tries to get them to backtrack. Too late, the entire tunnel collapses and as Spidey tries to dig his way out, he grabs a power line that's protective sheathing breaks so that he gets electrocuted.
Well, Black Cat's glaring down at him by that point, so that's less down to incompetence than angry ex with probability powers. It doesn't get any better in the second half (which takes place in Daredevil, because the shadowy organization that framed Felicia is trying to strongarm her into stealing something from Matt.)
{1st longbox, 133rd comic. Amazing Spider-Man #677, by Mark Waid (writer), Emma Rios (artist), Javier Rodriguez (color artist), Joe Caramagna (letterer)}
5 comments:
I feel like Peter would make his own deodourant, which as a happy side effect also dissolves Carnage.
I feel like his attempt would be a repeat of the serum he took that gave him 4 additional arms. Or he pulls a Luthor except instead of going bald, it gives him the Osborn hairdo (and makes him evil.)
Or the scent makes him irresistible to all his animal-themed enemies and awkward romance shenanigans result!
"Hey Vulture, I'm flattered, but you're too old for me!"
"The Kangaroo, Grizzly and Gibbon are all hoping to receive the red rose in tonight's ceremony, have you made your choice, Spider-Man?"
"Punches in the face for everybody!"
Exactly the sort of thing I would have expected to see in Tangled Web.
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