Do I Misunderstand The Character?

When it comes to fictional characters, do you ever get the feeling that you've completely misunderstood them?

Take Spider-Man. He's probably my favorite character, but I've started to wonder if I've missed the point with him. I see him as a character who is can be a top-notch superhero, or take care of the everyday aspects of life, like bills, family, girlfriends, and so on. It's trying to deal with both at the same time that's the issue, and so things inevitably fall through the cracks. Maybe the villain gets away because he's tired from studying, or he misses Aunt May's birthday because of a fight with the Vulturions. So he's a capable, intelligent guy, he just has a little too much on his plate.

Nowadays though, I get the impression he just can't handle anything. Can't really keep up with his arch-foes (I remember The Gauntlet seemed like nothing but his enemies kicking his butt, or at least getting away), losing his girlfriend. He's apparently coming off as such a lousy guy the idea he'd sic the cops on her for not hooking up with him seemed entirely feasible to Felicia Hardy.

I expect Peter Parker to have some misfortune, in costume or out. But I've always seen those misfortunes as a matter of circumstance. Like he could or would have avoided that problem, but something else came along which made it impossible. Now I wonder if I've ever really read Spider-Man comics where it went like that, because it's starting to seem like the issue is him, that other people could juggle both sides of his life, but Peter Parker's not cut out for it.

Maybe it's because I only read Spider-Man comics occasionally now. Maybe it's the writers. But I do wonder if I'm just missing the point. Anyway, that's my example. Do you have one, where there's a disconnect between how you see a character and how everyone else does?