Right before Deadpool trapped him with an MRI, then hacked off his arm, Cable said everyone had a plan to kill Deadpool, and we were going to see his. But let's face it, it would involve dismemberment, and then some combination of acid, concrete, and dumping the remains at the bottom of the ocean. That's everybody's plan to kill Deadpool, except for Marvel, who plan to do it by putting him in too many books and making everyone tired of him.
What I was wondering is, what the people's plans to kill Cable? We haven't seen the end of Wade's yet; I'm hoping it involves more than simply beheading or shooting him. Granting that those are Wade's two favorite ways kill people, he can be more creative than that.
I would suggest going back in time and simply making sure little Nathan Summers Askani Boyardee is never born. You'd think it'd be easy. All it involves is keeping Scott Summers from having sex, and how hard can that be, right? Based on X-Men history, turns out it's surprisingly difficult. Even without Mr. Sinister being the creepiest fan fiction writer ever ("I'm going to introduce a new character who looks just like Jean, but isn't, and Scott will fall in love and marry her and they'll have a baby, and then I'll abduct the baby!")
So that's out. How about a post-hypnotic command, something to exploit Cable's love of pouches? Force him to make sure everything is evenly distributed between all his pouches. What will he do when he has 37 bullets, and 15 bags of trail mix, but 117 pouches? While he's on a run to the store for more junk to even it out, you run him over with a car.
Put a reflective surface in front of him, see if he'll smash into it thinking it's Stryfe, and kill himself like birds do sometimes.
Tell him he loses all his guns in the divorce settlement with Wade and let grief do the rest.
See if you can convince Younger Cable that his older self has been turned to evil by showing him edited highlights, and let them go at it (preferably in a building you filled with explosives, just in case).
And so on.
What are your ideas for inventive ways to kill Cable?
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2 comments:
I think the best way to kill Cable... is to never ever read any book with him in it. Or, maybe by sticking a corkscrew in him, twisting it, and turning him inside out.
Damn, a corkscrew? That's brutal. Full points for that one.
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