Hey, Hey We're The Pandas

CalvinPitt: {There's a problem with that title.} Adorable Baby Panda: What? No there isn't. It's a great title. {Well, the follow up line would be something about 'people say we panda around', but "panda" isn't really a verb.} It should be! {Fine. Then what is someone doing if they're pandaing?} Um, uh it means you're doing something really awesome! {*raises eyebrow* Really? That's what you're going with?} Yes! {Good luck getting that one into the parlance.}

Bob needs a Hug. {Which one, Deadpool's Bob or GrimJack's Bob?} Both. Gatorlizard Bob is alone, drunk, and sad, and Parrot Bob has scurvy. {Then maybe parrot Bob needs Vitamin C, instead of hugs.} Panda Hugs are a fine source of Vitamin C! {Might keep that to yourself. If the Juice Producers hear, they'll engage in a scorched earth campaign to protect their monopoly as the Vitamin C source.} *snorts derisively* What are they going to do, throw fruit at me? {Well, they could always choke you with pulp, or toss you into a giant juicer.} Eeep. {Might be wise to discuss something other than hugs.}

Right. GrimJack earned some Applause for saving Bob, but he also hit a cop, so that's a Bonk. {Aw, he and Roscoe are old buddies, it's all in fun.} Roscoe didn't seem to like him very much, though. {Can't let on around his fellow officers. All a ruse.} *unconvinced* Mm-hmm. Darlin' Lil gets a Bonk for trying to get GrimJack shot. What a sore loser. {I think that's why "honor amongst thieves" is kind of a joke saying.} GrimJack has some honor. {Sure, but he's not just a thief. He's a solider, merc, assassin, spy, detective, periodic exorcist, drinking establishment entrepenuer. There's enough codes in those occupations for honor to carry over to his thieving. Sometimes.} *unconvinced* Uh-huh.

I don't know what to give Deadpool. Those arms dealers suckered him out of a lot of money. {Deadpool did most of that himself, and it's not like he's hurting for cash. Besides, he's happy with his purchase, isn't that the important thing?} I suppose, he beat Bob an awful lot, though. {He doesn't beat Bob that much.} Really *dials number on phone*

*Thousands of miles away. The phone rings* [Deadpool the Mer- I mean, Deadpool the Pirate, who is totally unrelated to recently dead Deadpool the Mercenary! Hey you roly-poly punching machine! Could you call later? I'm busy beating Bob. Bad parrot! Never tell people I'll do jobs for free! I'm a pirate! We're ruthless and greedy! And why aren't you sqwaking like a parrot when I hit you?]

*Back at the computer, ABP hangs up the phone* See? {Fine, Bonks it is, then.}