Paging Marvel's Editorial Staff. . .

You know what I've figured out? Every Wednesday, my Internet seems to go wonky in the middle of the day. It's fine in the morning, fine at night, but in the afternoon? Forget it. Whatever, the real gist of this post is Amazing Spider-Man #534, as Marvel's editors once again demonstrate that either they spend all their time sleeping, or they know less about Marvel history than I do, and mine is not an encyclopedic knowledge. Well, maybe a crappy set of enyclopedias.

What seems to be a major sign that Peter is starting to wonder about Iron Man comes when Stark tells him that Spidey is riding with the convoy because of his spider-sense. Peter gets concerned because he's sure he never mentioned that to Tony. Only Aunt May and MJ know about it, so Peter starts wondering just what Stark might be learning about him from that suit. All of this ties into my theory that post-death, Peter is as smart as ever, just slower on the uptake. You'd think he would have been dying to pick the costume apart and examine Stark's work, and with all the plane flights he's been on recently, there's been ample opportunity. It just occurs to him to check it out now? Sigh. Unfortunately, that seeming mis-characterization isn't what got me annoyed.

No, it's the assertion that 'only May and Mj know about that', "that" being his spider-sense.

First, I'd argue that just by virtue of having fought with him so many times, and knowing him as a civilian, Norman Osborn knows about it. Reed Richards has done all sorts of scans on Peter over the years, I'm sure he noticed it. The way Captain America was able to manipulate his movements in the fight, I'd figure Cap knows what guides Peter's moves. Mysterio and the Hobgoblin both used gases which effectively removed his spider-sense, but did nothing else. It seems odd to have a gas for the purposes of removing a person's extra-sensory ability, if you don't even know he has one.

But you know what? I'll let those slide. Maybe Norman's never figured out how Peter sensed the glider coming and got out of the way. Maybe Reed's scans can't detect whatever physiological signs a spider-sense might provide (I'd think there'd be at least some sort of irregularity in his brain). Maybe Cap's such a good fighter he instinctively understands how Peter moves, without knowing for certain what causes it. I don't think Mysterio knew originally his gas would have that effect, so maybe he just observed Spidey struggling more in battle when the gas was used, and didn't bother to question why.

Still, I know for a fact Daredevil knows about that spider-sense. In Daredevil #305 he asks for Peter's help in capturing the Surgeon General, with the idea that Peter will hit the night clubs she frequents, and his spider-sense will let him pick her out from the non-dangerous women. Spidey specifically asks Daredevil to keep it down about his spider-sense, as he liked to keep a few secrets. Silly Spidey. You think you didn't have many secrets in June of 1992? Wait until the summer of '06, it'll blow your mind.

But wait, the incompetence of Marvel's editors gets even better.

Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #4, part 10 of The Other, and actually pretty good, at least until Spidey meets the sentient mass of spiders at the end. Peter is tired of being poked and prodded. He starts to leave, Stark goes to put a hand on his shoulder and Peter jukes him, leaving Stark flat on his butt, how I'm not sure. I guess Peter tripped him. Pete says it's just instinct. Hank Pym says, and I quote 'This is related to your spider-sense, correct?' The emphasis is theirs. At any rate, guess who's standing right there, next to both Peter and Pym, when he says that? Can you guess? That's right, Tony Stark. So what the hell is this "I never told Tony about my spider-sense crap?" Yes Peter, in the sense of you actually bringing it up, you didn't. Pym brought it up, but you confirmed it, so you did play a role in telling him about its existence.

Look, I get that Peter is supposed to be having doubts. That's he's contemplating a turn in loyalties. I not only understand this, I'm waiting eagerly for the day I can root for him again. That said, it would be nice if the method JMS uses to plant doubt didn't directly contradict something written this year, in a major "event" he was, I assume, in charge of!

You want to plant doubt in Peter's mind? Here's some suggestions:

1) During the convoy scene, have Stark make a comment that Peter needs to calm down. When Peter asks what Stark's talking about, have Stark mention that he can see Peter's heartbeat and respiration are very high. This implies Stark is using the suit to keep tabs on Peter, without contradicting anything. Suspicions can still arise.

2) At the start of the issue, when Peter was expressing some sadness over the battle in Civil War #3, let Stark have the lines about how 'we gotta fight who we gotta fight' and 'we're just following orders, that's all.' In Peter's hands, those words sound tired, depressed, resigned to a fate he doesn't particularly like. In Stark's hands, spoken more confidently, with authority, as if to to get Peter's butt in gear, they come off as dismissive of Peter's concerns, as if this is stupid and trivial and Pete is wasting his time.

3) Just give us more stuff like Stark's line once they're being bombarded on Yancy Street. Stark says 'Great. See what you've started, Spider-Man?' Seriously, what's with that? Stark wanted Spidey with the convoy to sense danger. Spidey sensed danger. Stark is the one who decided that first, they needed to switch to an alternate route, and then decided that they couldn't wait to clear the protesters out of the way on that route and switched to the second alternate route, which ran through Yancy Street. Peter performed exactly the task Stark wanted him there for, and still got his head bitten off for his trouble. That makes one wonder why Peter would bother to put up with that shite. Edit: Well, it wasn't a bad idea in theory, but as pointed out by Tom in the comments, Iron Man is actually referring to the fact Wasp called him "Golden Boy", rather than Iron Man. In my defense, Marvel has made it pretty easy to envision Stark acting as I intially believed he did.