Thursday, April 13, 2017

Escalation Will Bring It To This Point Eventually

Yesterday a coworker and I started discussing the upcoming 8th Fast & the Furious movie. I can't remember what prompted it, but we got into talking about the constant search for new ridiculous sequences - from tanks, to massive cargo planes, to jumping between skyscrapers, now fighting a submarine - compared to where it started. My coworker mentioned it started to get really crazy once they added the Rock, and I mentioned they added Jason Statham*.

So my coworker said he wished they put Statham in as his character from The Transporter films, do an official crossover. I said sure, Automotive Movie Shared Universe, and let's throw in the Mad Max films***.

Then he suggested adding in Cars, which in retrospect, I don't know. We're going to give the cars sentience with the crazy stuff these characters put them through? Lightning McQueen was capable of feeling pain, right? But at the time I said, in that case we should throw in the Transformers movies to which, was a terrible idea, no reason to taint these other franchises with a Wahlberg.

Still, putting Dom and his family against a bunch of sentient machine-based lifeforms that are also ancient engines of destruction would also qualify as the next logical step in the series.

Maybe "logical" isn't the right word.

* I found myself rooting for him in the last movie, even though he was the bad guy, because he's fighting Vin Diesel and the Rock, and those guys are way bigger than him. I mean, the Rock is like three times bigger than Statham, it's hard not to root for the relatively little guy up against the dude with a bicep the size of Montana, even if the little guy did start it**.

** Assuming that you don't buy, "You killed my brother while stopping his various criminal enterprises" as a valid justification for Statham's character's actions.

*** Which came to mind because The Ringer had an article up about their suggestions for the next four films in the Fast & Furious series, and while I didn't bother to read the article, the image they had to accompany the link was of Vin Diesel and Charlize Theron as Furiosa from Fury Road.


SallyP said...

But...I like Jason Statham!

CalvinPitt said...

Well so do I, but they made him the bad guy in the 7th movie, so what can ya do? I think he was on the good guy's side this time around, though.