The Idiot Box Has Got Me Thinkin' Again

Why is Lethal Weapon showing on Comedy Central right now? Sure Riggs is a Three Stooges fan, and Gary Busey is always good for a laugh (like when he put his arm, haha!, over that open flame, hahaha!, that was hilarious!), but I don't think of it as comedy.

Of course, they say Scrubs is a comedy, and I watched that yesterday and can't recall laughing, so maybe it's me.

Either way, it neatly distracted me (for about 30 seconds) from thinking about the Cardinals' bullpen crapping its pants last night... again.

So I'm watching For A Few Dollars More last night. Good movie, don't like it quite as much as The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly (I think Tuco adds a lot to that one), but I started wondering. Indio rapes Mortimer's sister, she reaches her husband's gun during the rape... and shoots herself. Why not shoot Indio? All you have to do is raise the gun about three inches higher and the bullet goes in his torso. Afterwards, if you still want to kill yourself and rejoin your dead love, you can, but at least deal with his killer first.

I know, I know, if she did that, then what's Mortimer's motive for doing what he does. Uh, a Frank Castle-style war on scum like Indio, but who are not Indio?

And yes, I may have just spoiled some of the movie for you, but come on, it's been out for forty years, why haven't you watched it yet? Seriously, go rent it now, or else the Baby Panda will cry.

Watched that new Fantastic Four cartoon last night. Hey Thing vs. Hulk, always fun, though I could have used more punching and less talking. But what stuns me is Reed Richards. He brings Banner into their home, knowing he's the Hulk, and doesn't tell his friends. Then when Banner has Hulked out and destroyed property, he apologizes for keeping his friends in the dark.

Well, I am shocked at this portrayal. It is completely inconsistent with Reed's portrayal in Civil War, which we all know is the defining character piece for Reed Richards. Everyone knows Reed can't be bothered to slow down and explain things to lesser intellects like Sue, Johnny and Ben, nor can he be expected to worry about a little thing like property damage if the Hulk goes rampaging. Furthermore, what was Reed doing trying to fix Banner? He should be either surreptitiously sending him into deep space, or trying to turn him into a weapon for Tony Stark. This is an affront to the heart of the character.

Sigh. My sarcasm works so much better if people can see my face when I'm speaking it. Webcam? Nah. I'd never subject you to the horror of my face in real-time.

So I finally watched Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl last night. Well, most of it. I kept switching to TNT to catch the "Neo vs. 100 Agent Smiths" fight. Anyway, the thing that struck me was that Jake was on the money when described Jack's actions from the first movie. Outwardly, he's a complete buffoon, but he really is thinking ahead, anticipating what the people he's working with are going to do, and factoring that in to what he does.

He actually reminded me of Vash the Stampede (Trigun). People are always trying to kill Vash, and he runs around, screaming and jumping, and firing wildly, and you can't even believe he lives past the first five seconds, but when it's over you realize the bad guys have been stopped, and while there's massive property damage, nobody died. The "buffoon" was actually in control the whole time, though that's rarely recognized by the people. They tend to chalk it up to dumb luck.

Back to the movie. I don't care all that much for Orlando Bloom (blame it on my mother raving about how cute he is, ugh), but Keira Knightley was cool, and a good time was had by me, and that's what counts, right?

So yeah, another lazy TV-themed post. What do you want, it's Sunday. Football's about to start in 30 minutes!