You Make Believe, Nothing Is Wrong Until You're Applauding

{Any luck?} No, I spent all week running laps. {Why?} Because I was skipping training to search for UnCalvin. {Oh. Well, you shouldn't skip training.} I have to find UnCalvin! {I'm telling you, when it's time to find UnCalvin, you will. We are all connected by the strands of destiny. Or we're all baseball cards in the spokes of the Great Wheel of Ka.} Ka? There aren't birds around. {Ba-dump-dum. Very funny. Now pull up a seat and let's get to this, I got stuff to do.}

Bonks for the wannabe wizards in Blue Beetle. {That nerdy, pathetic attempt at evil tomfoolery gave me flashbacks to Buffy, Season 6, and that's never welcome.} So you're glad I'm hitting them? {Oh my yes. Give them a Tony Stark level bonk, if you could. If there's anything left of them after that and whatever Traci did, they'll be scared to cross the street against the lights.} Do you think I should hit Tiger Jani? {I don't know. She did eat a guy, and try and kill our heroes. On the other hand, she's a so-called "holy weapon", so she's probably just doing what comes naturally. Like a shark, and I'm generally opposed to hitting sharks after the fact. Unless the act like Curley. Stupid Jabberjaw, defiling the Church of the Stooges.} Well I don't know either, so I guess I won't. I will Bonk the Shocker. {He's just a victim of circumstance!} Yeah, but he's was hurting Peter because he was angry about the rest of his life. That's not doing what comes natural. {So that's the difference between him and Tiger Jani? You're sure you're not just scared of her?} I'm not scared! You made a good argument. {I've been known to do that.} Only sometimes. {That's all I can hope for, I fear.}

Traci 13 gets Applause for figuring out where the demons came from. {Never underestimate the power of solid research. It's like Indiana Jones says, some large percentage of demon fighting is spent in the library. And X never marks the spot. Q on the other hand. . .} Stop talking! {Jeez, testy!} Well, you were just rambling. {I always ramble. It's my gift, but if it bothers you, I'll stop.} Thank you. Bei Bang-Wen gets Applause for fighting a giant Tiger Jani person, even if he didn't have the Iron Fist. Applause for Captain Quaid, because he kept his promise to Kitty, to let her go in first, to help Peter keep his secret identity. {Yes, very nice.}

I think Jaime needs a Hug, he looked really sad at the end of the issue, and I want to give Vivatma a Hug too. I know he got over losing his emperor, but it still hurt him for awhile, so you know, I want to help. {Uh-huh.} So what, you're not talking to me now? {No, I'm just making sure not to ramble, seeing as how it disrupts your flow and all.} You're such a baby! {No, that would be you. I'm just a surly, smart-arsed adult.}