OK, we know you don't tug on Superman's cape*. This week Kate Bishop learned that you never tell Clint Barton that he 'can't make that shot.' My question is, in comic books, what are some other things you should never tell certain characters?
Obviously you should never tell Spider-Man that "At least things can't get any worse." That could probably apply to Spawn as well. I wouldn't advise telling the Hulk he can't lift something. Even if it's true (say, if you were talking about Mjolnir), the Hulk's liable to cause massive property damage in the attempt, or in the frustration that ensues**. You probably don't tell Hal Jordan he can't get a lady's phone number. You can probably say the same thing in regards to Dick Grayson or Clint Barton, come to think of it.
Can you think of any others?
* Though really, wouldn't it be a worse idea to tug on Batman's cape? Superman will probably turn around to see who wants to speak with him. Batman probably unleashes a ninja nerve strike on the offending party.
** But nobody will die. Hulk rampages that don't involve mind control do not result in innocent fatalities. That's what keeps the Hulk from needing to be destroyed.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
You don't challenge Doctor Doom to a death ray contest.
You don't put the Green Goblin in charge of a federally funded group of supervillains.
Actually what this does remind me of, is the Powers Coloring Book from a few years ago (I think it's reprinted in the 3rd TPB). It contained information for children on how to handle a powers encounter ("don't try and touch your favorite superhero in a fight, you might get vaporized", "If you see a truck containing radioactive material careening towards you, get out of the way and don't touch the material," etc). Very funny read if you haven't seen it before.
Don't mention "One Punch" to Guy Gardner. Ever.
Don't put Hal Jordan in a room full of yellow ceiling tiles.
Don't tell Power Girl that she should lay off of the diet soda.
Don't tell Captain America, "The Red Skull is SURELY dead this time!"
Don't try to drink Hercules under the table.
Don't put black-haired, blue-eyed teenage male orphans anywhere NEAR Batman.
Post a Comment