What I Bought 4/3/2024 - Part 1

My weather luck when I need to go into the field isn't terrible, but when it's bad, it decides to be bad in unique ways. Snow in April, 50 mph winds in December, what's supposed to be 1 hour of rain turns into 5 hours of intense thunderstorms.

Doctor Strange #14, by Jed MacKay (writer), Pasqual Ferry (artist), Heather Moore (color artist), Cory Petit (letterer) - Oh, don't give the Black Cat boob armor, Ross. She can't hide any tools in that!

Mordo's got the enchanted, living game book, so he's in charge. Strange draws the dragon away, seeing it as more than just something Mordo's using to destroy them. Which leaves the rest of his Secret Defenders to contend with Mordo. Hunter's Moon and Taskmaster are swept up in a scenario where they're leaders of opposing factions, who will ultimately fight to the death. It seems like a game with limited room for creativity, or maybe it just plays into their respective approaches.

Ferry lays out all the pages in curiously shaped panels that feel like they're meant to be symbols, but I have no idea of what. Circle atop three tall, narrow panels. Circle spilling off the left side of the page, on top of a wide panel with a little hill in the middle, on top of another circle spilling off the right side of the page.

But while Mordo's enjoying the show, he forgot about the thief. Felicia may not be into tabletop gaming, but she understands swiping the special book. So she does. Ferry drops the odd panel layouts, so I guess they were meant to reflect being in a game scenario, but it almost feels like the panels should be more rigid, because the game has set rules and only so many locales and creatures. 

Strange returns, having reached an accord with the book's intelligence. Mordo get punched out by Clea, Strange offers the book to I think an evil doppleganger of himself that is living in his house, and Mordo gets chucked in a crypt with the ghost dog and the snakes.

I am unclear if the dog and snakes wandered in by mistake and are now stuck - as Strange doesn't seem to know where they are - or if someone else (Clea, the general) chucked them in as part of a move against Strange, or if they have their own plans to harm Mordo. And then the last page is the start of the vampire event thing I'm going to try very hard to avoid the next few months.

Vengeance of the Moon Knight #4, by Jed MacKay (writer), Alessandro Cappuccio (artist), Rachelle Rosenberg (color artist), Cory Petit (letterer) - At least Hunter's Moon is a doctor. He surely knows a treatment for crescent-axe-in the pectoral.

It's Dr. Badr's turn on the sofa. He doesn't seem as bothered by Marc's death, as he is by the imposter. Well, that and the fact that with Khonshu sealed up, there won't be anymore Fists of Khonshu after the next time Badr dies. None except the imposter, and that's not OK with him. I think Cappuccio draws Badr as more physically expressive in his civilian duds than his costume.

I don't mean facial expression, since we can't see that under the mask, but his hands are more active in the conversation with the doctor. In costume, his arms are either at his sides, or in front of him, like he's guarding his heart. In civilian garb, he gestures a lot more. When describing how this fake Moon Knight fights, he moves his arms more than he does while actually fighting. Fidgets with his glasses, tents his fingers, puts his hand to his head. Maybe he's more relaxed around Sterman, or more controlled when on the job.

When not with Dr. Sterman, the rest of the issue is Tigra and Badr hitting the new guy where he lives. Which is where Marc died. Great strategy to keep anyone from looking for you, but not great in that it pisses off a tiger-woman once she's found you. And Badr has figured out some of the imposter's identity as a result of those past Khonshu Fist memories.

I like that, if MacKay's going to go the "long and storied" tradition route with Moon Knights, he picked something to differentiate it from other of the other, similar lineages. Iron Fists may have a book about them, but that's not the same as being able to relive their experiences.

Anyway, they unmask the guy, and hey, I was right, it's the Shroud. Sweet, I'm now 8-for-873 on predictions on this blog! Go me!

Sunday Splash Page #317

 

"Bug Hunt", in Locust #2, by Massimo Rosi (writer), Alex Nieto (artist), Mattia Gentili (letterer)

Set in the aftermath of some strange plague or apocalypse where people appear to be spontaneously turning into giant locusts, Locust follows a man named Max through two different time periods.

In the present, he's hunting for a girl named Stella. Stella's been taken by a man named Ford, so Max moves through a dark, largely empty landscape, following a trail of Ford's followers and encampments. Nieto covers everything in extremely dark, murky colors, to the point it's hard to tell what's happening sometimes. That's OK, because most of what's happening is best categorized as, "not good." Child sacrifice, people in heavy robes talking about divine punishment, that sort of thing.

In the past, we see Max and his mother during the early days of whatever is going on. Max is trying to get them to safety, but finding it difficult. Fortunately, they're rescued after a car wreck by a man named Ford. Ford seems organized, disciplined, with a large group of well-armed people ready and willing to follow his commands. I see no possible way that could end with child endangerment!

The scenes in the past have a more varied color scheme. Still murky, but there's the reds of the taillights, the orange of fires burning in the chaos. The former police station where Ford's established his base is tinted a dull, sickly green. Not sure what kind of lighting they're using for that, but I guess you use what you've got in an apocalypse.

It makes sense. The scenes in the past, society is just starting its descent. There's still life and struggle and all that. The scenes in the present, the world has more or less settled into what's passing for normal. The locusts aren't going away, aren't being cured. People are hiding in the remains of what came before, but they aren't building anything back up. It's like a dying star, down to a few faint, flickering embers.

As you can see, Nieto adopts a variety of body styles for the afflicted. I never noticed any pattern to what sort of appearance a given person took after the transformation, but there may be one. Or they may just be at different stages, with that big winged one being the final form. There's a fair amount of body horror, panels focused on people peeling their skin away, revealing compound eyes and exoskeletons, or the giant locusts tearing flesh away from a victim's face. The latter sort of thing usually isn't as focused on as the transformations. The death is an end state, while the transformation signals a new problem to deal with. A stranger, or even someone Max knew well, that's become a threat just like that.

Saturday Splash Page #119

 

"180 x 9mm Invert", in Street Angel #5, by Jim Rugg (writer/artist/letterer), Brian Maruca (writer)

Jesse Sanchez is an orphan, a martial artist, an expert skateboarder who goes by the name "Street Angel." As a caption box informs us in the first issue, she fights 'for the poor, the forgotten, and whenever possible, for food.'

Rugg and Maruca originally published the 5-issue mini-series in 2004 through Slave Labor, though I picked this up as a nice hardcover released through Adhouse Books about 10 years ago. Over the five issues, Jesse saves the city (and the mayor's spoiled, uselss daughter) from the villainy of Dr. Pangea, finds herself in the middle of a ninja/conquistador war, complete with an oblivious Irish astronaut, fends off a demon with the "help" of Jesus, saves a new friend from an escapee from The Ring, and keeps a bunch of rednecks from killing a black guy for being too fly. It is exactly the sort of wild combination of disparate elements I love.

It's a lot of action, with Jesse being mostly irritated she has to deal with all these idiots causing trouble around her, but Rugg and Maruca use that to show her sarcastic teen side. After beating up the cops that tried to bring her to the mayor, she kicks his door in and spends the entire conversation talking through a megaphone she swiped from those cops. While also calling the chief of police a pervert repeatedly. Eh, he probably was. There's a one-page story (where Rugg draws the characters closer to a Little Orphan Annie style) where her friend/sidekick convinces her a baby skeleton is actually a leprechaun skeleton, and Jesse will get a reward for taking it to the hospital.

She does not get a reward. But in a different one-page comic, she gets invited to a birthday party, where she learns about the existence of pinatas and their delightful, sugary innards!

They do sometimes touch on the notion that this is not a great life for Jesse, beyond the gags about Jesse being mad if someone eats her lunch. One story is just Jesse going about her day, hanging out with some of her other friends who live on the street, trying to find some food. That involves her getting embarrassed when a girl from school sees Jesse jump out of a dumpster, and Jesse losing a trucker cap she found in one dumpster, in a different dumpster.

But mostly, it's fighting, and Rugg can vary the presentation of it in a lot of ways. He might have a 3-panel sequence where the first panel shows a cop grabbing Jesse's arm, which flows into the second panel of her other fist clenching, which moves directly into her punching the cop. Or a silent, single image like above. Or a brief sequence of Jesse and another character beating the hell out of each other. Two pages after the splash page above, Rugg gives us a two-page sequence that's just Jesse slaughtering over two dozen guys, with panels scattered across the page, sound effects in 10 different fonts, some of them going backwards across the page, a rocket launcher fired in one panel on the left side of the page, flies clear across the background to explode on the right side of the page. It's excellent work, I'm very jealous.

Rugg and Maruca have done maybe 6 or 7 Street Angel one-shots (released through Image) since this hardcover was released. They're in color, and based on the one I read, it felt like the color takes away the effect of Rugg's shading. But the one I read also didn't have a lot of fighting in it, so maybe it wouldn't have noticed as much during action sequences.

What I Bought 3/30/2024 - Part 2

A month ago, it came out that the folks running Scout Comics hadn't been paying the writers and artists of the comics, or even responding to questions about why they weren't being paid. No explanation for uneven publishing schedules, unfulfilled promises about promoting books, real bad look all around.

The CEO types are in typical C.Y.A. mode, but I guess that explains why I hadn't seen anything released by Scout in the last 2 months. I figured the company went under, and maybe they have for all intents and purposes. Guess I'll have to wait and see if anything shows up.

Deer Editor #3, by Ryan K. Lindsay (writer), Sami Kivela (artist), Lauren Affe (colorist), Jim Campbell (letterer) - A blackjack doesn't seem the ideal weapon for vampires, unless it's soaked in holy water.

Bucky goes to the neighborhood the mayor bought up, and finds Rose, the mayor's daughter there. All the other houses are full of other vampires, a quiet little community they can bring victims to and feed with certainty no one will report anything. But Rose knows nothing about any of this, the neighbors bursting in flame and becoming far less human-looking a total surprise, so what's she there for?

They go on the run, apparently cross-country, while Bucky tries to figure that out. By the time he does, Rose has ditched him and. . .that's pretty much it for Rose until the final page. Bucky goes back to Sheltered Cove with his sub-editor, Soo (the girl on the cover). The two of them go house-to-house, naming the vamps and either staking them or throwing them into the sun, all on video. Which seems like a lot of murders to be recording yourself committing, but I guess the mayor thought it might be too obvious to pass any laws extending protection to the undead.

And that's pretty much it. Bucky knows there's more out there - Rose, most notably - but he's not going looking for it, under some vague, "the story will find you," reasoning. I don't know if that's meant to be a statement on being a reporter versus a "hero." Bucky pursued the story. He was wrong several times, but he kept going and if one element eluded him, he just followed the ones he still had. He's not going to devote his life to pursuing every last thread. It feels like follow-up on the loose threads would be part of a reporter's job, but maybe not.

It feels like Kivela draws more panels that are strictly Bucky's face, or that emphasize the fact he's a deer in some way. A close-up of a lip curled in a challenge, or him turning to address someone, almost nothing visible from the neck down. Lindsay's certainly writing Bucky as more quick to violence, and that usually involves ramming someone with his antlers. If he slams a guy facefirst into a deck railing, kivela draws it so Bucky's hooves are a prominent part. Three fingers (or two and a thumb, whichever), with those long black nails.

I still don't know why they made the main character a talking deer beyond the opportunity for a pun with the title. Deer are traditionally prey, and vampires a traditionally predators, but he's flipped that script. Or everyone can see that he's different, even if nobody is shown staring or acting shocked, so his actions are out in the open. Even on the run, Bucky can't hide. The mayor and his bunch do, however, which might be why he's so hellbent on exposing what they're doing. No shadows, no secrets, out in the light where everyone can see them, like they can always see him.

That's probably not it. I've yet to read anything by Lindsay where I could figure out what point he was trying to make.

Chasing Kangaroos - Tim Flannery

This book is largely about kangaroos. Their past and development, what we know of it, and also their present, as the world around them continues to shift. It's often detailed through Flannery's stories about his own travels around Australia. Sometimes for work, but in the early chapters, it's he and a friend using the Christmas break between semesters to try and circumnavigate Australia on their motorcycles. Mechanical breakdown and subsequent arson cuts the trip short.

The stories include a lot of descriptions of the colorful characters Flannery meets along the way, something that continues once he's visiting different locales as part of fossil studies. This includes a cook for a sheep-shearing crew who is very happy to meet Flannery at first, but becomes increasingly unfriendly because he heard "paleontologist" as "opossum", and thought Flannery was there to get rid of the opossums breeding and squabbling in the ceiling of the bunkhouse. It results in a casual tone which makes the book at times feel like almost a travelogue or reminiscence.

Which is not to say the book skimps on details about the animals. I did learn a lot about kangaroos. How spotty the fossil record is, for one thing. There's a (or perhaps was, the book was published in 2004) gap between roughly 50 to 20 million years ago where they have basically nothing, which makes it hard to figure out the radiation and evolution of characteristics. Plus other smaller gaps closer to the present, during which certain group seem to vanish entirely, while others explode in frequency. Also how many species there, once you include wallabies, tree-kangaroos, rat-kangaroos, padamelons, which I guess I wasn't thinking of as "kangaroos", so much as other types of animals altogether.

As you'd guess, there's a lot of peculiar, specialized biology in kangaroos. In some species, the female can get pregnant while still nursing another joey. Their body takes advantage of the forces generated by hopping to make respiration easier, by having the gut essentially push against the lungs to expel air. There are trade-offs. A roo's foot can't really rotate left to right, due to the features that reinforce it against the impact on the ground.

In the travels of youth portions of the book, Flannery frequently describes encounters with Indigenous Australians, who he had apparently never seen prior to his motorcycle journey. He'll describe the circumstances of their lives in the brief glimpses he gets. Poverty or how wishing a "Merry Christmas" can result in an explosion of anger from an elderly man who had been entirely genial up to then. It feels out of place initially, Flannery deciding to throw his guilt about how the Indigenous Australians had been done wrong.

But he brings it around in the latter stages when he discusses the species that are under dire threat from introduced predators, habitat loss, or climate change. He points to how the Indigenous Australians have been an integral part of the how the kangaroos have evolved or declined for many thousands (at least 40,000) years, and how barring them from their traditional practices, such as burning, have impacted the animals as well as the people. That there is a lot about these animals that white Australians, including himself, know very little about, and may never know if the species is truly extinct, because no one bothered to ask the people who'd been hunting and interacting with them for millennia.

'The Lani were absolutely right, for the kangaroo is host to the worms, which it feeds chewed leaves, while the creature itself feeds upon the worms and their by-products. Thus, in a very real sense, some kangaroos eat worms even though they swallow leaves or grass.'

What I Bought 3/30/2024 - Part 1

Sometimes when I drive at night, I think about the person who came up with these blindingly bright headlights. Seems like three-quarters of all cars have them now. I think about having that person flogged. Headlights that blind all the other drivers, what a brilliant idea.

Morning Star #1, by David Andry and Tim Daniel (writers), Marco Finnegan (artist), Jason Wordie (colorist), Justin Birch (letterer) - Nothing like a family vacation in nature. The ticks, the humidity, sleeping on rocks, the ticks. . .

The book opens on two wildfire-fighters, trying to escape a blaze that's gone beyond their control. Instead, they find the rest of the guys in their squad, curiously frozen in a pile. Wordie colors them in an orange-hued negative look, and no explanation is given as it happens to at least one of the other two.

A year later, the widow of the guy we didn't see get frozen is preparing to take her two kids and the urn containing her husband's "ashes" to the forest. But first she's getting a lot of static from her mother, via her sister, as they want her to move back to Connecticut. The sister is, however, incredibly bad a diplomacy - calling your niece and nephew "screwed up" to their mom's face is not a winning argument -  so that goes nowhere.

The remainder of the issue is the trio traveling to the forest. Mostly this establishes that Charlie, the younger sibling, spends a lot of time lost in his imagination, or "exploring other dimensions" as he apparently describes it. Wordie uses a lot of off-color or neon blues and greens for when Finnegan draws what Charlie's seeing. And he sees something that looks like his father floating in the air outside the fire tower that first night.

So it feels like the book will focus on Charlie. We see that Jolene (the widow) takes no crap from anyone, and maybe drinks a bit. There's a comment near the end of the issue that makes me wonder, anyway. But she seems to keep a cool head with her kids. Takes Charlie's reluctance to speak in stride, at least.

Marabeth we're not given much on. She isn't complaining about spending time in the woods, seems comfortable in the ballcap/t-shirt/jeans look she's rocking (this is set in the 1950s), and is very concerned at the possibility of being moved cross-country and away from her friends. She only seems mildly annoyed by her brother, if I'm reading the eye roll Finnegan gives her correctly when she comments, 'He's exploring other dimensions. Again.' But there's no name calling or second-hand embarrassment at the behavior.

Jackpot and Black Cat #1, by Celeste Bronfman (writer), Emilio Laiso (artist), Brian Reber (color artist), Ariana Maher (letterer) - What's sparked this sudden burst of generosity by the Black Cat?

Felicia's robbing Chance's flying, invisible casino, and very quickly we're off to a questionable start. Why? Because Bronfman writes Chance as saying the casino's great because, with the patrons being criminals burning their ill-gotten loot, it's all reward, no risk. This is the exact opposite of how Chance operates! This is the character who said "Life is dull at best, made tolerable only by risk." He's a bigger thrill-seeker than the Black Cat! 

OK, fine, whatever. Chance is just a guy getting robbed by Felicia, whose heist is noticed by Jackpot. Felicia explains some app on her phone is threatening her if she doesn't commit crimes. MJ, recognizing Felicia doesn't typically kowtow to threats, follows her (as a little pink energy butterfly similar to how Psylocke's power used to be drawn), and finds out Felicia's got a new girlfriend.

Jackpot has this Paul guy all the Spider-fans seem to hate do some snooping, interrogates the original creator of the app, then has to keep him and her self from being killed by a bunch of weirdos following orders from an app. Which she does by getting essentially Medusa-hair for a superpower. Oh, and now the app is on her phone, threatening to kill Paul if she doesn't commit crimes.

So, this is a sentient program trying to gather resources for some big plan, right? Basically what Ryan North did in Fantastic Four a few months ago, just more ethically compromised? I mean, that was my first thought, when the app is just appearing on people's phones, and it already knows Jackpot's connection to Paul and who Felicia is, and the guy who originally created the app is clueless. The program's running itself.

But, OK, positives. Mary Jane wanting to stick by her friend, even when her friend tries to keep her out. Felicia being suspicious of someone following her, and not pleased when they don't take the hint. Those character bits felt well done. Don't know what happened to Odessa, but Felicia's got a girlfriend besides in flashbacks, that's nice. I feel like Bronfman and Laiso are being more creative with the powers Jackpot gets. Not wildly so, I mean Darkforce portals and prehensile hair aren't reinventing the wheel, but the energy butterfly thing was kind of nifty. If you're going to give Mary Jane an H-Dial, then get friggin' weird with the thing.

(Along that line, I don't like that she can just immediately spin the thing again if she gets a power she doesn't like. Make her find a way to use what she's got, or wait a while. It's too overpowered to just let her spam the thing until she hits the lotto.)

I don't know if either book convinced me to buy issue 2. I can see talking myself into them, but that's not exactly a high bar. They're both definitely me gambling on the things I like being more prevalent in upcoming issues than the things I didn't care about.

Killshot (2008)

Blackbird (Mickey Rourke) is a contract killer on the outs with his boss in the Toronto Mafia. So when he gets temporarily carjacked by hyped-up idiot Richie (Joseph Gordon Levitt) who claims he's intimidated a local real estate bigwig into coughing up 20 grand, he rolls with it. Besides, the idiot reminds him of his dead younger brother.

Unfortunately, the bigwig's not in his office, but an unemployed welder looking for a career change (Thomas Jane) is, and he chucks the tweaked-out moron out the window. And his ex-wife (Diane Lane) who is a realtor, sees Blackbird's face. So it's into witness protection for them, in Cape Girardeau, no less. I remember, years ago, the guys in the comic store talking about a movie being filmed down by the river. Guess this was it.

To Batman, criminals may be a superstitious, cowardly lot. In Elmore Leonard's world, they're just dumb as hell. Richie no patience, no control, no powers of observation. He brags about robbing a bank for $2,700, or about killing a guy running the register at a gas station, when all these things do is emphasize how stupid and small his "ideas" are.

For all that Blackbird stands quietly a lot or talks about rules, all he's got is one dead brother, another in prison for life, a boss pissed Blackbird killed his side piece, and a blue Cadillac he has to burn after Richie's poorly thought out plan goes pear-shaped. He's more patient, but his self-control and judgment clearly aren't much better. He has to figure sleeping with Richie's girlfriend (Rosario Dawson) is a bad idea, but he does it anyway. He has to know sticking with Richie at all is a bad idea, better to kill him and go solo. But he's trying to make up for past mistakes and does it anyway.

I did want to know why Blackbird didn't want his grandmother to make him an owl, and wanted to be a blackbird instead. I assume there was some significance to the difference, but he never explains that.

Land and Jane are stuck with the less-interesting tasks of being an estranged couple thrown into this mess together. They've tried to have the "normal" life that Richie and Blackbird have either eschewed or simply gone too far afield to have, but it hasn't really worked out. Jane didn't want their marriage to end because he thought it was doing OK, but Lane disagrees, but she still calls him when she's having problems, but she doesn't want him to have a key to the house any longer. He sees the relocation as a chance to start over, she just wants to go home.

So Jane walks and stands with an air of perpetual frustration, like he wants to explode but won't let himself. Diane Lane seems like she's always two seconds from bursting into tears, which she actually does in the first scene where we see her, so I guess that's the effect she was going for.

Communicative Malfeasance

{Clever Adolescent Panda and Calvin arrive at Calvin's apartment building.}

CAP: How are you feeling after your trip?

Calvin: Better than Alex's other friend. That guy did a number on himself. It's never a good sign when you're puking in a Casey's parking lot in some desolate north Missouri town before noon.

CAP: You humans and your addictive vices.

Calvin: *flatly* Oatmeal raisin cookies.

CAP: Where?! *looks around frantically, then leaps on Calvin* Do you have some?!

Calvin: *straining to stay upright* No, get off me!

CAP: Phooey. *climbs down reluctantly* The parking lot looks really full.

Calvin: It's the two maintenance vans. One of the neighbors moved out, they're probably tidying up the place.

{The building's interior is quiet. The duo proceed up the stairs.}

CAP: Well, we have to be ready. Pollock's probably going to show up tomorrow.

Calvin: Maybe she'll bring actual Thin Mint cookies this time.

{The interior of Calvin's apartment is as silent as the rest of the building. Against the opposite wall, a clear plastic tube emerges from the floor, then makes a 90-degree turn at eye level.}

Calvin: That's new.

CAP: *steps closer, sniffing the air* What is it?

Calvin: *ducks beneath the end of the pipe and drops his bag at the dinner table* A warp pipe, obviously. I hope it doesn't lead to an underwater level. Hate those.

{The sound of rushing air suddenly emerges from the pipe. Clever Adolescent Panda hurriedly ducks as the cylinder comes flying out of the pipe and hits the opposite wall.}

Calvin: Hey!

CAP: Don't worry, I'm OK.

Calvin: Never a doubt, with your reflexes. *yells into the pipe* You put a dent in my wall, jerkass!

CAP: *picks up the cylinder* It's marked "urgent delivery."

Calvin: *rolls his eyes* I bet it is.

CAP: Pollock?

Calvin: Who else? Is the tube buzzing or ticking?

CAP: Unh-uh. It doesn't smell like anything dangerous, either.

Calvin: *deep sigh* Well, hand it here and then get behind the breakfast bar. That way at least you'll be alive to avenge me.

{Clever Adolescent Panda hands over the cylinder and retreats into the kitchen, peering from around the corner. Calvin sighs again.}

Calvin: I've had a good run. I mean, not really, but it hasn't been terrible. *pops the top off the cylinder, a paper roll slides out*

CAP: *from behind the counter* What is it? A threatening note? A secret code? A treasure map? *sticks head over the counter, ears perked up and eyes shining* A treasure map would be awesome!

Calvin: None of the above. It is - *scans the paper* a letter asking me to take their online survey to share my thoughts on the pneumatic tube system.

CAP: *ears droop, eyes turn dull* Oh, that's, um, that's, 

Calvin: Disappointing. Deflating?

CAP: Yes. OOOH, but now you can give them a really bad review!

Calvin: Except there's no web address, just one of those Rorschach test QR codes, which *holds up his flip phone* I can't do anything with. 

{A mocking cackle echoes up the pneumatic tube.}

Calvin: You got an up-to-date phone with all the bells and whistles, right?

CAP: *offended* Of course! Pandas have excellent phones, with no tracking apps or sharing of data with third-party companies!

Calvin: And 6G internet?

CAP: *annoyingly smug* 9G. The pages load before you even know you want them.

Calvin: Sounds disturbingly like artificial intelligence run amok. *holds out the paper* But whatever, you access the survey. Be as mean as you want. Pretend you're Deadpool, or me after several hours of driving in traffic.

CAP: *trundles into Calvin's study* No way.

{Cackling laughter echoes from the pneumatic tube.}

Calvin: Motherfu - *screams down the tube* Shut the hell up!

{More laughter.}

Calvin: *to Clever Adolescent Panda* Why not?

{Clever Adolescent Panda reenters the living room, holding Calvin's ragged and smelly running shirt. They hold it up, a wicked grin on their face. Calvin offers a thumbs up.}

CAP: *loudly, right next to the tube's opening* It could be a scam to infect my phone with malware!

The Voice at the Other End of the Tube: Now, wait just a min - 

{Clever Adolescent Panda jams the t-shirt in the tube. It's immediately sucked out of sight to the levels below.}

The Voice at the Other End of the Tube: What this? Oh, ye gods, the stench! *retching* It's awful! *more retching and gagging*

Calvin: It's not that bad, you big baby!

CAP: Yeah, it only made my eyes water a little! *whispers to Calvin* When was the last time you washed that shirt?

Calvin: *shrugs* I dunno. Throw it in the washing machine while you're down there!

{Pounding footsteps on the stairs echo through the walls.}

Calvin: You want to get the door or be the greeter?

CAP: *huge grin* Greeter, please.

Calvin: *steps to the door* You got it.

{Calvin wrenches the door open wide. Pollock comes flying through the entrance, breaching kick rendered useless, and tumbles into Clever Adolescent Panda's grip.}

CAP: Happy April Fools' Day! *belly-to-belly suplexes Pollock*

Pollock: *groaning* Was. . .that. . .necessary?

CAP: It was fun!

Calvin: And what could be more necessary than fun in these trying times?

Pollock: *wheezing* Delightful. Panda, will you please get off me?

CAP: No "Accursed Furball"?

Pollock: Not when my ribcage is being rendered concave by your big posterior!

Calvin: Saying they've got a big butt isn't nice just because you phrase it obliquely.

CAP: Yeah! *sits more heavily. Pollock's eyes bulge* I do have a big butt, though. It's part of my genetic makeup.

Calvin: And part of your low center-of-gravity, pinball-esque fighting style. *Clever Adolescent Panda lets Pollock stand* Now, to brass tacks. What is this contraption out of the 1920s doing in my apartment?

Pollock: *dusts herself off* I'm taking advantage of the growing discontent with an online world increasingly under the control of morally questionable oligarchs.

CAP: Aren't you a morally questionable oligarch?

Pollock: *offended* Absolutely not! There's nothing questionable about my morals.

Calvin: Because they don't exist.

CAP: *busts out laughing* He got you there.

Pollock: Swine.

CAP: *glowers* Do I need to sit on you again?

Pollock: *backpedals towards the balcony* Absolutely not. My point is, I'm offering a way for people to keep in touch with fewer complications. There's no way to store a message in a tube on the cloud, or sell it to some advertising bot. It's the next logical step for people who have shifted away from smartphones.

{Pollock scribbles a note, then stuffs it in the cylinder.}

Pollock: You just put whatever you want to say in the message cylinder, throw it in the tube {throws cylinder in the tube} and away you go! With no one other than your intended recipient any the wiser!

Calvin: As long as they have a tube in their home or office. Doesn't that one just go to my building's laundry room?

Pollock: *eyes shift left-to-right* Yes.

CAP: Does anyone other than Calvin even have one?

Pollock: My office building, but the Pony Express started small, too! The telegraph, the telephone, the Internet didn't connect everyone in the world right from the start, you know!

CAP: I guess that's true. It's going to cost a lot to install these across the country.

Pollock: Not to worry. I have lobbyists working feverishly to get me billions of dollars in subsidies to cover that.

Calvin: {over CAP's groan} Aren't these things going to get in everyone's way?

Pollock: We bury them. That's part of what the subsidies will cover. If we also happen to damage fiberoptic lines in the process, hampering wireless communication, that's just a fortunate happenstance.

{It's Calvin's turn to groan.}

CAP: Hey, how do you make sure it goes to the right place? There's no address label on the tube.*excitedly* Is there some gizmo on the opening you twist until the address appears? Rings of letters and numbers?

Calvin: That would really capture the practical, retro touch.

Pollock: There is, but only at the central routing hub.

CAP: Routing hub?

Pollock: Yes, all the cylinders go to a single location, where my employees will open them, read the contents to learn the destination, then adjust the entry tubes.

{Calvin and Clever Adolescent Panda both sigh.}

Calvin: So you get to read everyone's mail and learn all their stuff?

CAP: And take any baked goods they were sending along? {Pollock and Calvin look at the panda.} What? I never got any cookies.

Pollock: Well, yes. Not to the stealing cookies part, but gathering information, certainly. But I won't sell it! Nothing so crass. I'll use it to gain insights on what people are concerned about or feel is lacking in their lives.

Calvin: {rummaging in his fridge} So you can make products people really need, by directing research efforts that direction?

Pollock: Yes. That way, I don't even need to make targeted ads. It will be enough to simply announce the existence of my latest product and wait for them to buy it.

CAP: I guess that's not so bad. Besides the invasion of privacy. What if your employees try to blackmail people?

Pollock: That would violate company policy. No blackmail or extortion that doesn't offer a cut to me.

CAP: I'm gonna suplex you off the balcony.

{With a shriek, Pollock sprints away, vaulting the railing and landing nimbly in the parking lot below. She rushes to one of the white panel vans.}

Pollock: Ha-ha! Too slow, Accursed Furball! And by selecting a workman's van, you never suspected it was mine to tamper with! Ha - splut!

Calvin: *hits Pollock in the face with an egg* We were going to make a cake to hit you with, but you showed up early.

Calvin: *holds out a carton to Clever Adolescent Panda* Join me?

CAP: *picks egg* I'd be delighted.

{Pollock retreats to the van. An egg spatters against her back before she can climb inside. The van's engine rumbles to life.}

Calvin: *singing* Saw a panel van drivin' by, cocked the arm back and let one fly!

Pollock: *rolls down window, shakes fist* Suckers, they come, a dime a doz - *hit in the face with an egg*

CAP: Yes! I mean, um, we all dressed in comfy clothes, we didn't sneak in because we lived in that home. The eggs did crack on Pollock's, um, dome?

Calvin: Aw man, you let the beat drop.

CAP: Sorry.

Calvin: It's fine. I assume the Beastie Boys would want it that way.

{Pollock escapes the parking lot. Clever Adolescent Panda and Calvin watch her go.}

Calvin: What the heck am I going to do with this tube? Probably lose my security deposit.

CAP: I think what Deadpool did to your bathroom two Blogsgivings ago guaranteed that.

Calvin: Probably just having Deadpool in the apartment did that.

CAP: Yeah. *awkward silence* So, are we still going to make a cake?

Sunday Splash Page #316

 

"Little Big House," in Locke and Key: Small World, by Gabriel Rodriguez and Joe Hill (storytellers), Jay Fotos (colorist), Robbie Robbins (letterer)

Since Locke & Key: Alpha concluded, Hill and Rodriguez have done a series of shorter books. Those revolve around Keyhouse, but not Tyler, Kinsey, or Bode. I suppose Tyler at least ought to be aging out of the point where he can remember the keys or the magic. Though we did see him build a key to restore Keyhouse entirely, so. . .

All the stories since then have focused on an early-20th Century generation of the Locke family. Pale Battalions Go was about John, the younger son, swiping keys to fight in World War I. This does not end well, and if I remember right, he ends up using the Anywhere Key to transport himself into the Titanic's sunken hull as penance for his hubris. To think we still have to rely on shoddily built submarines for that purpose.

There was also a crossover with Sandman, which I haven't read, but I think revolves around John's oldest sister, Mary (the blonde above) trying to rescue his soul from Hell via Dream's realm, which is a bad idea on so many levels one scarce knows where to begin.

This is the only one I still have, a done-in-one about Chamberlin Locke building this dollhouse that, when activated, can show the location and activity of every person in it. He expects the girls to use this birthday present to learn about keeping house properly. Mary sees it as a great way to gather blackmail on her brothers, while Jean sees it as a great place to hide boogers.

Problem being, the door swings both ways. Actions taken in the larger house are reflected in the doll house, but things placed inside the doll house from outside then manifest in the real house, at a proportionate scale. So when Jean leaves the dollhouse active and a spider wanders in, well. It's bigger than the dolls, so the version that is loose in Keyhouse is, too. It's an effective little horror tale (which Hill says owes a lot to Richard Matheson's The Shrinking Man.)

Saturday Splash Page #118

 

"Sho' 'Nuff"", in Street Fighter Alpha ch. 7, vol. 1, by Masahiko Nakahiro

I don't know all the ins-and-outs of Street Fighter continuity, so I'm not sure how Alpha relates to II. I'm guessing it's an alternate timeline to account for adding new characters and shifting the backstories and relationships of various characters.

Now Ryu and Ken's teacher was killed by his brother, Akuma, who has mastered some force called the "Dark Hadou," which Ryu keeps tapping into when he loses control of his anger or his life is threatened. Except Ryu doesn't control it, he just goes Kung-Fu Incredible Hulk on everyone. He's now responsible not just for the big scar across Sagat's chest, but also taking his eye.

This two-volume manga really ups the destructive power of, well a couple of characters. Ryu destroys a police cruiser the first time he goes off, dodging bullets and no-selling everyone's attacks like the most annoying pro wrestler you can think of. In the climactic fight, he and Bison wipe out a skyscraper fighting up the side of it.

But most of it is about Ryu trying to come to grips with the Dark Hadou. You know, acknowledge the darkness and power within him and accept it, rather than denying it. This is expressed through the Shoryuken attack, which is at least one thing consistent between the two mangas. Both stories insist Shoryuken is a lethal attack, one that Ryu hesitates to use for that very reason. Ken, on the other hand, spams the things like it's the only button combo he ever figured out. 

Nakahiro draws the Shoryuken as the entire character doing a twisting uppercut (see above), while Kanzaki drew it like only the forearm was corkscrewing or, like, formed little buzzsaw tornadoes around it (see last week's entry.) I think Nakahiro's style, looser, more simplified style works better. It also works with Alpha's more humorous tone, especially with the addition of Dan Hibiki as the jobber, and Ryu being the sort of a meathead who complains when Chun-Li has his gi washed - awful nice after he was acting as bodyguard for a gang and destroyed a ship - because it washed off the essence of all the fighting spirit from his countless battles.

Those are probably the parts I like best, the lighter bits. Or the fights that are driven by more personal things. Ken's up there punching Ryu to convince the both of them the Shoryuken isn't automatically going to mean unleashing the Dark Hadou, because their master told him he'd have to kill Ryu if that happened, and Ken can't stand that idea. Or when Chun-Li stops Ryu from jumping in to help a genetically engineered soldier of Bison's (not yet named Cammy), only to jump in and defend her herself. It works better than when some character named Guy no-sells the Dark Hadou while telling Ryu that he threatens the destiny of the world, and so the world may destroy him. I, um, OK? Sounds like a lot of New Age horseshit you'd say when trying to sell me special "crystals".

Random Back Issues #125 - Suicide Squad #41

Now we know Captain Boomerang buys his gear from Acme.

Alright, Amanda Waller was released from prison last issue, because the U.S. government needs someone to deal with the Soviets getting involved in suppressing a revolution in Vlatava. Batman's involved, too, after investigating the murder of a cargo hauler on the Gotham docks led him right into the Steel Wolf, Stalnoivolk. Batsy's not too happy about working with Waller, but he's never happy, so whatever.

By now, Stalnoivolk's in Vlatava, watching the incumbent leader's forces get trounced by the Vlatavan rebels, led by a manic Count Vertigo. The Russian super-speedsters Blue Trinity are there in plainclothes, but they aren't doing any better against Vertigo, and his power even messes with missile guidance systems, so forget using those.

So the Steel Wolf picks up Molotov, and chucks the Russian with the exploding power at Vertigo. Doesn't kill him, does knock him flat, putting the rebels in retreat. Stalnoivolk's more concerned with the notion someone tried to double-cross him in Gotham, but Zastrow (essentially Waller's Soviet counterpart) is more concerned with General Kaligari, current ruler of Vlatava. The general wants more overt support from the USSR. Tanks and soldiers and such. Zastrow points out the Red Shadows are meant to counter Vertigo, while keeping Soviet involvement under the radar, but recognizes Kaligari could out their presence to make Gorbachev look bad, on the chance it gets him replaced with a more hardline leader. Which is something Stalnoivolk might appreciate as well. So maybe he blew his own cover?

With thought processes like this, it would be a miracle if every real-world intelligence agency didn't decimate itself.

While all that's going on, Waller's getting the team back together. First to Paris, where Vixen's showing off one of her own designs on the catwalk. She's not keen on rejoining the Squad, until Waller mentions she knows where Ben Turner, the Bronze Tiger, is. Ben flipped out (or was induced into a breakdown) courtesy of Sarge Steel around the time the Squad fell apart, then vanished. Mari's concerned, so she's in.

Ben's not doing well, or even thinking of himself as "Ben." The two start fighting, to the amusement of some dipshit Great White Hunter. But Alan Buck-and-a-Quartermain catches a bottle in the face from Waller and she uses his machine gun to end the lover's spat. Ben doesn't want to wipe the paint he regards as his face away, but Waller ain't having any of it, and what the Wall wants, she gets.

Meanwhile, Batman's in Puerto Azul's capital, where General Vaca's reign is going down the toilet, to his indifference, and a conniving Poison Ivy's fury. But it's fine, she's drained the treasury and she's got her own guards to help her escape. Oh, wait, Batman's here to tell her that her accounts are frozen, and her guards. . .

Yep, the inevitable result of combining "Batman" and "goons." If Ivy wants out, it'll be with him, and she'll have to work to earn her escape. From there, Bats travels to London, where Ravan set up shop, killing people as part of his beliefs that he delays the arrival of Kali by doing so. Batman blows up the church and walks out with Ravan slung over his shoulder. 

That's four. Who's Waller picking for her fifth? Why none other than Ol' Boomerbutt, looking much the worse for wear after a year on the island where she stranded him after his exposure as the Mystery Pie Thrower. In fact, Boomerang's about to launch himself off the island - and to his death - on a giant boomerang he's constructed out of - actually, I don't know what he made it out of. Palm fronds? Either way, Vixen launches it prematurely and once Digger sees it smashed to pieces on the rocks, agrees to join up.

Well, the team's assembled, what can go wrong? Maybe a shadowy figure who is aware of all this, and tells Deadshot to kill Waller?

{10th longbox, 280th comic. Suicide Squad #41, by Kim Yale and John Ostrander (writers), Geof Isherwood (artist), Carl Gafford (colorist), Todd Klein (letterer)}

Out of the Syberian Wastes

It's been a decade since I played through the first two Syberia games. I was worried where Syberia 2 left Kate Walker, and based on how Syberia 3 starts, it was a valid concern. She wakes up in a hospital that's clearly seen better days (not a unique condition in this fictional world), run by medical staff that seem determined she stay there. To the point of questioning the stability of her mental state.

Oh goody, one of the concepts that creeps me out. Really wish the game would let Kate run faster.

Kate was found near-death by a Youkol caravan, and brought to the hospital with their guide, Kurk, who needs a prosthetic leg. Unfortunately, the battle-ax of a head physician is just as determined Kurk not leave until she's finished warping his mind with drugs and hypnosis. And the doc, sorry, Dr. Olga Efimova - she's always referred to by her full name and title - is working with some eye-patched, Baron Strucker lookalike of a colonel who wants Kate Walker in custody.

The story is Kate first getting herself and later Kurk the hell out of that place, and then helping the Youkols and their giant, woolly ostriches follow the migration route. This, like the first two games, results in solving a bunch of puzzles requiring Kate to grab almost any random item she can and combine them MacGyver style into whatever she needs.

There are different ways you can interact with things, like simply observing something, or picking it up to add to your inventory, or actively moving it, if it's a lever. Each action tied to a different button, signaled by its position on the little ring and probably its color if you're using a standard controller. Moving things is tricky, as you have to hold the button then move the joystick, and the controllers can be a bit touchy.

This sometimes also requires talking to people. While the game offers different dialogue options, you can usually progress regardless of what choice you make. It's mostly a matter of how you want to play Kate. I opted for polite, with a mix of charm and humor as seemed workable. These conversations can also help you figure out what you need to do with the eclectic arrangement of crap you collect, but sometimes I was stuck just trying to use everything in my inventory to interact with an object until something happened.

How was I supposed to know the sawdust went in the drawers of the steampunk smoke machine I needed to activate to get the Youkols permission to pass a non-sacred bridge?

The problem is, the nature of the gameplay doesn't match the story. Kate and the Youkols are supposed to be working against a clock of sorts. The colonel and Dr. Olga Efimova are after them, and the colonel's got a missile-armed helicopter and AK-47 toting soldiers at his disposal. But no matter how long it takes me to figure out what I'm supposed to do, the pursuit is always just slow enough, never quite able to mobilize fast enough.

In the first two games, any resistance of that sort was less organized and much more limited. The monks that were reluctant to release Hans, for example, hadn't the resources to pursue Kate once she got back to the train, even if they wanted to. Time wasn't so critical. Here, even when the ship they use to cross a lake comes under attack by a freaking kraken and Kate has to figure out some way to turn off all the lights, there's no real urgency. You have as much time as you need to figure out where to find a crowbar to smash the lights.

To be clear, I appreciate the puzzles aren't timed, but I think it works cross-purpose to the story.

The game itself can lag, and there was one point it kept crashing as I would finish a brief cut scene. Which was especially annoying because I knew exactly what I needed to do next for once, and had everything ready to go. All I needed was the game to stop crashing long enough to turn on the Ferris wheel.

Syberia 3 plays pretty much like the first two games, which makes it feel like a bit of a throwback they tried to upscale graphically to more recent console generations. But it still suffers from weird camera angles that make it hard to tell where you can and can't go, which is the sort of thing that actually needed improving. The at times, questionable, voice acting doesn't help. I don't know if they used a computer speech program for the minor characters, but there are times whoever is speaking sounds like they've never done it before.

I didn't find Syberia 3 as frustrating as the earlier games, which might owe to my being slightly more patient than I used to be, but I was more disappointed by it than the earlier games.

Summer Manga-thon

I'm still not seeing a lot of stuff I want to get in the June solicits, but there were at least several manga series with new volumes I might get (eventually.) DC continues to get shut out, and while I can appreciate they've dialed back their line, in contrast to Marvel's bloat, where it feels like it takes five minutes to scroll past the Star Wars stuff, it'd be nice if there was at least something I was interested in.

Meanwhile, Marvel's in the middle of this Blood Hunt thing, and I think I might skip Fantastic Four and Vengeance of the Moon Knight, since both books are doing tie-in issues.

What's coming out that's new? Look, I will not be buying this, but figured I would mention Winnie the Pooh: Demon Hunter, a 4-issue mini-series coming out through Antarctic Press. Make whatever preparations you feel appropriate for that event, whether it's setting aside money to buy it, or setting aside money for an apocalypse bunker.

Fairsquare Comics has Tunis to Sydney, written by Meriam and Christian Carnouche, with Sam Rapley as artist, about a woman returning home after the deaths of her parents, and unpacking emotional baggage around that.

Humanoids has Cyn, a graphic novel by Ibrahim Moustafa about former cyborg enforcer trying to find peace. Joanne Starer and Diego Greco also have Total Suplex of the Heart, about a journalist joining a wrestling club, but getting swept up in drama. I haven't really loved the stuff I've picked up from Humanoids, but it's always different writers and artists, so I keep trying.

What's ending this month? Three Marvel minis: Jackpot and Black Cat, Black Widow and Hawkeye, and Ms. Marvel: Mutant Menace. Which isn't great news for Marvel. That's half the stuff I might buy in June. Three-quarters if I do avoid the event tie-ins. Maybe they'll come up with something in July.

What's that leave? Like I said, there's several manga in the solicits. Volume 6 of No Longer Allowed in Another World (Seven Seas), and volume 7 of The Boxer (Ize Press). Also volume 15 of that deluxe edition of Soul Eater (Square Enix Manga), and the second volume of Momo Legendary Warrior (via Alien Books). I called it My Name is Shingo Perfect when the first volume was solicited, but it's actually just My Name is Shingo, but a perfect edition, and now the second volume is being solicited by Viz Media.

I haven't seen Shingo or Momo yet, so I don't know if I'd pick them up, and I have my doubts about ever catching up on Soul Eater, but this helps me keep them in mind, at least.

As far as single issues, a trio of third issues. Deadpool, Blow Away, Morning Star. Blood and Fire is on issue 2, while Rogues will be on issue 4. Although I'm a little concerned about Scout Comics. There were a couple of things solicited for this month that never showed. I'm still waiting for the last issue of Space Outlaw. Come on, already!

Cadillac Man (1990)

Joey (Robin Williams) is a car salesman. One shameless enough to try and sell a car to a widow on the way to the cemetery. But hey, he's got money problems, what with the ex-wife and teenage daughter, and two mistresses. The mistresses are played by Fran Drescher and Lori Petty. There's apparently a 14-year gap between Williams and Petty's actual ages, but I think they're playing it as much larger here. He's also gotta sell a bunch of cars at the dealership's big "we're moving!" sale, or he won't be moving with it.

Too bad Larry (Tim Robbins) comes crashing through the window on his motorcycle with an AK because he's tired of his wife cheating on him. At which point, it becomes a sort of comedic hostage situation? Joey claims to be the one Donna's cheating on Larry with, then also tries to help Larry make it out of this without killing anyone or being killed by the cops that quickly surround the place.

So much yelling in this movie. I was grateful for Larry's arrival through the display window, because the movie was doing an extended bit where Joey is trying to juggle three different customers, all of whom are yelling for him while he's yelling back, plus ringing phones. I was getting a headache. Of course, then Larry's yelling, punctuated with machine gun fire, which prompted a lot of screaming. So, you know, life closes a door in the face of screeching Christmas carolers, and opens a window on a road construction crew.

There's a whole, not even a subplot, about the daughter not having come home the night before, and Joey and his ex-wife arguing over the phone about it during the hostage situation. She just, shows up, at the end, I guess as a symbol of how Joey trying to be a stand-up guy and protect others has made him someone deserving of a second chance at having family. It felt pointless, though, to have them going on about it and then it resolves itself at the end.

What I Bought 3/20/2024 - Part 2

So much time on the road last week. 300+ miles of driving on Tuesday, but it was a productive day. 400+ miles on Thursday, and it was a shitshow, as expected. 500 miles on Saturday, which was family-related, so it was, fine.

Fantastic Four #18, by Ryan North (writer), Carlos Gomez (artist), Jesus Arbutov (color artist), Joe Caramagna (letterer) - I really wanted to see Ben Grimm clobber a meteor with a telephone pole.

Couple of reveals in this issue. First, once a year, Franklin Richards unlocks those crazy powers of his to look at what might be coming in the year ahead. This year, it was a swarm of invisible meteors, which he foresees his family not being able to stop. If you ever wanted to see Reed Richards pierced by dozens of meteors, this is your comic. 

Franklin uses his powers to nudge the meteors on a different course (that will not aim them at anyone else, which is a nice touch.) Then his powers shut down and he goes to sleep, not remembering any of it (until next year.)

Two, Nicolas Scratch and his terrible costume are watching the FF, so he sees Franklin's little show and reverses. Death by invisible meteors is go! Things start the same, but Alicia comes up with the idea of using the light Johnny generates with his fire, manipulated by Sue's powers, to create a laser which Reed and Ben guide visually. Death by meteors averted! Booooooo.

On the other hand, Jo-Nah asks if Johnny and Sue are going to visit to Cyclops and gloat about their cool laser eye power, and I think they should absolutely do that. Rub Cyclops' nose in the futility of his existence!

Vengeance of the Moon Knight #3, by Jed MacKay (writer), Alessandro Cappuccio (artist), Rachelle Rosenberg (color artist), Cory Petit (letterer) - It'd be funny if he got the crescent blades tangled and whacked himself in the back of the head by accident.

It's Soldier's turn with the doctor, and he feels guilty. What a shock. He thinks he should have died instead of Marc, because that was his job, to die for his boss. Since it's a little late for that, he's taking his own approach to trying to stop the Shroud, I mean, this new Moon Knight. Which involves calling in a debt from the Chinatown vamps Marc helped out in the last year of his previous book.

I have a hunch Soldier's actually setting them up, too, since he had 8-Ball get him into the Bar with No Name to meet with someone Cappuccio keeps obscured. Could be wrong. Maybe he was setting up the 4 super-villains attacking the Midnight Mission because they think Moon Knight's there, to try and impress the seriousness of the situation, but that seems a little much. Soldier describes them as a "gang", and I can't see a gang encouraging someone coming onto their turf and unloading machine guns and flamethrowers. But I've not been in a gang, so what do I know?

Soldier also seems like he might be embracing his vampiric side. Reese knows the mist trick and whatnot, but she doesn't show her fangs as much as Soldier, who takes full advantage of the resilience and healing. He runs right into the gunfire, doesn't care if pieces of himself get blown off. Guess we'll see how far that attitude goes if he gets a crack at the new guy.

Sunday Splash Page #315

 

"Two's Company," Locke and Key: Omega #5, by Joe Hill (writer), Gabriel Rodriguez (artist), Jay Fotos (colorist), Robbie Robbins (letterer)

The conclusion to Locke and Key was split between two mini-series, Omega and Alpha (helpfully collected together in volume 6 of the tpbs.) Omega, a 5-issue mini-series, came first, followed by the 2-issue Alpha.

Omega takes place near the end of the school year, all the students looking to their future, and to regrets. In Tyler's case, a lot of regrets, which he seems to be trying to run from by burying himself in work around the house. Similar to Volume 1, although he might see it as trying to become more responsible so he doesn't repeat those past mistakes.

The kids decide to have a post-prom party in the caves under Keyhouse (drained of water this time), which is when Dodge - still inside Bode's body, with basically all the keys, and golden eyes as he makes no attempt to disguise his presence - makes his move. As Tyler, his mother, his uncle and the detective come under attack from shadows, Dodge uses more shadows to gather the high schoolers at the doorway to his world.

Alpha is when Dodge reveals his true plan, which is not what Kinsey or we might expect. More critically, it's when Tyler comes up with a plan to counterattack, based on a conversation he has while dying with his dad's spirit. As a rule, last-second, death door's epiphanies are more useful than last-second, death bed recanting, but are also much rarer so I guess Tyler's luck was running good that day.

Tyler takes advantage of one last gift of his dad's, and that combined, with the return of Rufus and the fact memories extracted via the Head Key can't drown, is enough to take care of Dodge once and for all. A few characters die and stay dead. One character's dead and doesn't stay dead. A couple are already dead, but end up, I guess extra dead. Perma-dead? Unable to be summoned via the well, at any rate.

Saturday Splash Page #117

 

"Gut Punch," in Street Fighter II - The Manga, vol. 2, ch. 9, by Masaomi Kanzaki

Despite being consistently gawd-awful at the games, I always find myself drawn back to Street Fighter comics. Like the games, the comics never quite seem to be what I'm looking for. Probably because they so often seem to revolve around Ryu, and I don't really care about him. Goku's just about the only, "goofy but kind guy with a huge appetite who loves the challenge of a good fight" character I have time for.

Yet I still try. This 3 volume manga was based on, as the name suggests, Street Fighter II, and the first 2 volumes one big fighting tournament, funded by the mysterious M. Bison. Ryu's seeking several things: his teacher's killer, his best friend Ken, and a good challenge. Guile's out for revenge for a dead friend. Chun-Li's out for revenge for her father, but is trying to find evidence linking Bison to a drug known as "Doll" to get him arrested.

It's interesting to see the differences between this and what the canon of the games would become later. Here, Doll is a drug that makes people into obedient weapons. Later, Doll refers to genetically engineered fighters for Bison, most notably Cammy. Here, Bison killed Ryu and Ken's master, but later it's Gokuen's brother Akuma that's responsible. Blanka's a conniving and vicious figure, trying to prove he should be one of Bison's sub-bosses, rather than a gentle being tortured by Bison's experiments. Dhalsim's a grief-stricken man who wears his dead children's skulls(?!) around his neck. A far cry from the calm and measured sage he becomes in later versions.

The fights vary from somewhat silly (Chun-Li versus E. Honda) to kind of cheesy. Guile beats Zangief with a powerbomb and when the Russian expresses shock Guile would use a wrestling move, Captain Flattop responds that he's from the Land of the Free, so he's free to fight how he likes. Dude deserved the ass-whupping he got from Sagat in the next round, I'll tell you. There's a bit of blood - Ken shatters his fist punching a wall when he breaks the drug's control during a fight with Ryu - but this isn't Mortal Kombat. Nobody's got bones sticking through the skin or being disemboweled. Bison swings Ryu headfirst into the floor, but that's no match for true Fighting Spirit!

There's a persistent thread in the story that anger only weakens you. Guile's focused on revenge and fights stupid against Zangief, which leaves him too injured to even slow Sagat down. Blanka's vicious out of an inferiority complex, and nearly wins because Chun-Li loses control of her own anger and grief. Ryu manages to focus on winning, even when faced with the man who killed his teacher, and makes it to the top. He crushes Bison, wins the tournament, and then is off in search of his next opponent.

So for volume 3, Kanzaki plays off the game mechanic of fighting yourself. Everyone gets lured to the same location, and have to team-up to fight palette-swapped versions of themselves who are, of course, convinced they're the "real" ones.

What I Bought 3/20/2024 - Part 1

The march through my movie collection continues. Today is Iron Man. Last night was Inherit the Wind, and prior to that, the first 3 Indiana Jones movies. So, in that regard at least, it's been a good week.

I bought 3 Marvel comics this week, so let's start with the one from a mini-series.

Night Thrasher #2, by J. Holtham (writer), Nelson Daniel (artist), Matt Milla (color artist), Travis Lanham (letterer) - Just a couple of street fightin' men.

Dwayne licks his wounds after Rage whupped his ass last issue. Sil urges him to try and reach Rage, but Dwayne's going to rely on his fists. He also gets some new armor, but the design seems a lot like what he had during the "reality TV" run, with the duster over the armor. I like Silhouette's blue-and-black armor, though I'm not sure if that's new. Feels like I've seen it before.

As Dwayne does his training montage, Rage and his crew of kids prepare for another big play. Unfortunately, the cops are setting a trap, while adding checkpoints and constant patrols. And the cop in charge is of course the sort who insists if anyone objects to having their i.d. checked, it means they're hiding something. Sure, they're hiding that they don't like your face.

Rage and the kids attack a gentrified section of the neighborhood, the cops move in, which probably wouldn't make much difference if Night Thrasher doesn't show up and take down Rage, leaving the kids easy pickings for the cops, who decide to go ahead and arrest any other people who just happen to be standing around, including Night Thrasher. Good thing he's got an ex-girlfriend with access to the Darkforce Dimension, but now things are worse.

So I guess next issue, Dwayne resumes being involved in the neighborhood. He said he was back, but just being back to kick an old friend's ass isn't helping. In the early issues of New Warriors, he was marked by his obsession with fighting crime and trying to avenge his parents' death, to the point it was a struggle for him to pull away from that when his friends needed help. Batman, if being a total dick actually had consequences.

Setting aside crime-fighting, helping the neighborhood, keeping locals from being priced out, that's going to be an endless battle, too. I wonder if having died, then come back through what he defines as a fluke has taken that sort of drive out of him. And that's why he wanted to just start over somewhere else, he thought a clean slate would be an easier road to hoe.

Ears of the Jungle - Pierre Boulle

Set during the Vietnam War, the United States tries some trickery that involves seeding the jungles with listening devices that look like plants, so they can hear the truck convoys at night and precisely bomb them.

The trick is almost immediately revealed to the NVA's head of intelligence, a Madame Ngha, because she's made allies of the hill people in those jungles, who can recognize plants that don't belong. From that point forward, the book is Madame Ngha figuring out how to manipulate the U.S. into bombing things to the benefit of the North Vietnamese. Play recordings of trucks in an open field that has a lot of game, let the bombers kill a bunch of buffalo to feed the hill people and the NVA. The Air Force switched to napalm? Get them to bomb places that could be used to plant rice. The Air Force switched to herbicides that effectively salt the earth? Get them to bomb a place you want to build a new highway.

The U.S. is too impressed with their technological marvel to figure out it's been turned against them. Everything is automated, so the people in charge barely have any idea of where they're hearing the "convoys" or what they're bombing. Totally divorced from the process, or maybe even from reality. There's a brief digression where, as the U.S. is dropping all these defoliants that will stop the jungle from growing back for potentially decades, they are also very concerned with the damage done to the environment by use of chemicals at home. This does eventually carry to the war, but it means they just go back to dropping high explosives. More environmentally friendly.

And Madame Ngha has an agent working for the general in charge, who is of course touched by Thu's stories of how she desperately wants to help the Americans after the NVA killed her family. Except it was actually a flight of B-52s that killed her family, but it lets the general feel like a dad, since he's apparently failed so utterly at maintaining a connection with his own daughter.

There's also a subplot where Thu, when alone in her quarters, envisions herself with a family of her own, complete with a maid and the maid's daughter (also named Thu.) I guess the emotional toll of the war, which the Americans are also oblivious to as they bomb the shit out of villages. She's dedicated to her duties, but she also likes the fantasy she's been able to concoct while working for the Americans. Not really sure what I was supposed to take from that.

I think The Bridge Over the River Kwai was a stronger book, maybe for being more focused. Or the notion of the incredibly sophisticated fake plant listening devices, which are nonetheless immediately thwarted, felt too fanciful. The book read easily enough; it wasn't any sort of difficulty to get through, but I kept waiting to feel drawn in, really invested in what was happening. But the Americans were duped so thoroughly, so quickly, there were never any stakes beyond what particular goal Madame Ngha felt like using them to achieve at that moment. By 50 pages in, there was no chance the bombers would hit anyone she didn't allow as part of some larger plan, so there was no tension to the proceedings.

'The process rendered the place immaculate, leaving only ashes, but poisoned ashes, from which nothing could ever rise again, lying in a desolate landscape forbidden to all vegetation. This dead earth, it was clear, could no longer bear rice or manioc.

Yet for all this, traffic on the trail continued uninterrupted.'

The Lighthouse (2019)

If you ever wanted to see Robert Pattinson beat it to a scrimshaw model of a mermaid that may exist, or may merely be a representation of his inner demons, twice!, this is the movie for you!

What a perfect way to start post #6,000.

Now that everyone is either sufficiently intrigued, or has run screaming from this blog, we can continue. Winslow (Pattinson) is on a 4 week tour tending a lighthouse somewhere at sea. His superior, Tom (Willem Dafoe), is a bearded, bug-eyed, limping old man who alternates insults and mockery with compliments and tales of his life at sea before his injury. The specifics of how he was injured change, but what doesn't change is that tending the light is his duty. Everything else, hauling oil, shoveling coal for the foghorn, repairing the roof on their home, falls to Winslow.

The movie plays with time, in that there's no clear sense of how long they've been at the lighthouse. They reach what is meant to be the end of their four weeks, which Winslow and Tom celebrate by getting blind drunk, but a terrible storm rises and their relief doesn't arrive. Does his killing a seagull in a fit of frustration (and he kills the hell out of that bird, no question), have anything to do with it? Well, Tom would certainly think so.

After that, Winslow's grip on reality, already tenuous due to past decisions he hasn't come to grips with yet, begins to slip. The rain keeps coming, the roof leaks get worse, there's less coal in the wheelbarrow and more water. Winslow starts drinking regularly, after refusing to do so the first 4 weeks. Pattinson gets sloppier with his dress, with his movements, indifferent to the weather. Time slips, too. We see what seems to be one day of this routine, but Tom insists it's already been weeks, confusing Winslow as much as us.

The movie's shot all in black and white, or really grey. Even before the storm arrives, it's never sunny. Grey sky, grey sea, grey buildings, with the characters especially blocked in by the 1.19:1 aspect ratio the film's shot in. The attempt to paint the lighthouse seems futile even before the platform breaks under Winslow. The interior of the house is dimly lit by those skies or flickering oil lamps that only make Dafoe look wilder when he really get going.

Dafoe does great work shifting between being a hardass, gentle encouragement, a poor, wounded old man, or an all-seeing sage. He'll let Winslow lug a huge drum of oil up the stairs before offering him the more manageable metal spout, then tell him to lug the drum back down. But he'll also offer him compliments and praise, that he'll do a fine job tending his own lighthouse some day. He can get so offended when Winslow won't say he likes how Tom prepares lobster that he calls on Neptune to curse Winslow, but also sit there calmly rocking in a chair and imply it was Winslow who chased Tom with an axe, not the other way around like we just saw.

It gets especially strange near the end, with lines like, "You smell like a hot onion fucked a farmyard shithouse!" or one character making the other follow him around on hands and knees like a dog. It might have been a little too comic for what seemed like a bleak descent into madness as the isolation leaves Winslow too much time with his own thoughts and failings.