Cut Off The Nose From Your Face, Then You Won't Feel So Out Of Place

Hey, that's not a very adorable song lyric title! {. . .} Calvin? {How much do you think the guy who reads the forecasts on the Weather Channel's "Local on the 8s" makes? That seems like a pretty sweet gig.} Uh, are you ready? {Not really. I think I might go stare into space for awhile. You go ahead.} Calvin? Calvin? Fine, I can do this. I've done it before.

So, yeah, where to start? I want Bonk Mantis, but I guess I should Applaud her also. She's still on the loose, but she left her teammates to get captured, and that's not being a good teammate at all. Not like Gabe, who gets big-time Applause for his big stand against the weird drone things. Thataway Gabe! And um, a Hug for Groot, because he just looks so cute being tiny.

Bonk to the Bucky in Cable/Deadpool, for being such a little psycho. He was completely out of control! [You got that right.] Deadpool! You're OK! I was worried after you got shot in the head! [Healing factor, remember? Little thing like losing some brain matter won't stop me. Course, some would say I've been missing brain matter for years, which would really just bolster my point, but still. . .] Uh, thanks for sharing, Wade. I'm kind of busy. [Well, am I gonna get a round of applause, or at least a hug?] Sure, you deserve a Hug, but I couldn't figure what exactly you did to stop that monster, so I'm not sure you get applause. [What did I do? Well, that's easy I, uh, with the time skips, and the uh, never mind.]

Well, then that means I can move on. I'm going to Applaud Orson Randall for being awesome, and helping all his friends live a long time, but I'm also going to Hug Lucky Pierre for all the stress he went through following Orson around all those years. [Lucky Pierre? That just so happens to be something I call -] {Wade! Over the Appropriateness Line there!} [Hey, so he is here! Why isn't he helping?] I don't know; he's been acting weird all afternoon. [Maybe he's a clone, or an evil opposite.] I'd know if it was UnCalvinPitt, but I guess he could be a clone. Why don't you investigate? [I'm on it! Heh, that's what she said.] She who? [You are a little slow, aren't you?] I am not! Get out of here! [Fine, geez, I'll go sleuth a bit.] Finally. Back to work. Bonks for HYDRA, because they're HYDRA. I don't think I need a better reason.

Bonks to Ultimate SHIELD for attacking Spider-Man. I know Fury isn't there, but didn't they get the memo that Spider-Man is on their side? Hugs for Mary Jane, who really doesn't need Norman Osborn on the loose after all the mutation problems lately. And a Hug for Aunt May too, who had her date broken up by all this. {Owwww, that's my gall bladder!} [You don't need it. Now what have you done with the real Calvin!] {I am the real Calvin, you pockmarked, brain damaged freak! Get the hell off me, and get out of here, or I'll burn all the copies of your title I own!} *sound of running, getting closer* [Uh, ABP, I've got to go. I suggest just leaving him be. Bye.] Well that didn't help. I guess while I'm at it a Hug for Peter wouldn't be a bad idea, since his trying to do the right thing got him in trouble again. It really isn't fair, you know.

Anyone else has any suggestions, just leave them in the usual place, and I'll get to them later.