What About . . . Eyebrows?

AMC is having a "Seven Nights of Hitchcock" event running this week, which was a little surprising. I didn't think AMC still showed classic movies. OK, that's a little harsh, but Catwoman, Wyatt Earp? Not helping the channel's standing, at least with me (which I'm sure makes them sad).

Anyway, I've only been half paying attention so far. I watched roughly the first hour of The Birds (hey, Monday Night Football was on!), and the main thing I got out of it was finally understanding why Hitchcock is walking two dogs in the cameo in that Simpsons episode. You know, when Marge is in Streetcar Named Desire, and Maggie reprises Steve McQueen's role in The Great Escape?

Holy crap, those two sentences just reminded how freaking awesome The Simpsons used to be. I still enjoy the show now, but back in the day it was something else. All these whippersnappers have no idea. Where was I, you know how we old-timers tend to ramble on.

There was one other thing I took from The Birds, and it was mostly surprise that it took so long for the shit to hit the fan, and the birds to go large-scale murderous. The movie had been going for an hour (with commercials) when it all went down, and the waiting had left me wondering when exactly the shoe was going to drop. Which I suppose works nicely with Hitchcock's ideas about suspense, me knowing something will happen, but wondering when. It does lead me to wonder what effect he was going for with the original audience, people who have seen the advertisements in the paper, or maybe on TV (radio?), going to the theater with no idea what's going to happen other than it involves birds. Were they sitting there, expecting the birds to attack and wondering when, or was it a different feeling, trying to figure out exactly what was going to happen?

Tonight they're showing Vertigo, which I've seen before. It's not bad, but I prefer Rear Window, which feels more straightforward. Vertigo starts to lose me near the end, when it feels like we're supposed to understand all the stuff about twins, and how they used Jimmy Stewart. Plus, it creeps me out just how broken ole' James Stewart winds up in this flick. It doesn't creep me out as much as the eyebrows on the women, though. My goodness, it looks like those eyebrows are taped on, and could be removed at any moment, to be used as Batarangs. I wonder if Batman ever thought of that as a weapon. No one would expect you to attack with eyebrows.