Low Blood Sugar Makes For Dangerous Pandas

I'm feeling kind of hungry, and what about the title? {Let's just do the post and maybe I'll get a title by the time we're done.} OK. I'm glad you bought more comics this week. {No problem. Should have a good number of comics for you next week, too.} You better!

I'm Applauding Rictor, because he totally beat Huber! {I think "survived" is a little more accurate.} Quiet. Do you think that was a one time thing, since the crystals fell off his back? {I hope not, that would seem kind of cheap. I'm still not sure what exactly he was doing. I think he's like Leech.} Who? {Little mutant kid, can drain powers if he gets too close.} But he didn't drain the powers, they just stopped working on him. {Then how do you explain Huber shifting out of his Colossus form?} Uh, Applause for the Worldmind, for that totally crazy plan that got them past the barrier. {I still think it was a bunch of hooey.} I could explain it you, but it would involve worlds like "acceleration", and "gravity". {And now you're just being snotty.} Ignoring that, Applause for the doctor from The Punisher. Because even though he doesn't like Frank, he decided it was better to let him escape than keep him there where Barracuda could kill a lot of people coming after him.

I hurt my hands applauding so much. {Really? That's pretty impressive. I'm a golf clap man myself, usually accompanied with a head turn and raised nose, so I look kind of aristocratic.} Aristocratic, in your jeans and baseball cap? {If you've got the attitude, then the clothes don't matter.} I don't believe that, but I'm going to turn to the cops in The Punisher, and give them Bonks! {Gasp, you can't bonk officers of the law!} Pandas are above human laws, and those cops didn't care that they were endangering a lot of people by keeping the Punisher in that hospital! They could have at least moved him to a less populated place! {You're above human laws? Little full of yourself, aren't you?} We pandas defend the universe against the greatest evil imaginable; we can't be slowed down by laws of species which don't understand. {That's the kind of attitude that brings Tony Stark to your door with a bunch of SHIELD agents.} Fine. I can deal with Stark, if he wants to try something. {OK, I'm getting a little nervous now. How about we get back to bonking *internal monologue*(as if ABP talking about who should get hit is gonna make me less nervous) *end internal monologue*.} Bonks to those racist parents in X-Factor. Stop raising your children to hate! Raise them to love! Hate is a penguin weapon! {Getting loud.} Silence! {Okey-doke. I'll just go in the other room, leave you to your work.} Bonk to Gene Thompson, because May went to him, wanting to talk, and he broke up with her, all because his needs were being met! What a jackass! Everyone is so mean!

[Hey everybody, what's up?] {Wade, I really wouldn't go in there now, ABP is getting kind of intense.} [Oh, how bad can it be? Hey you cute little - AHHHHH! Ow, my retinas! My tibia shouldn't bend that way!] RAHRRGH! You hurt Calvin's spleen the last time you were here, and you keep stealing his mini-pizzas! Panda SMASH! {Whoa, ABP, calm down! It's just Wade, you don't need to smash him. I'm OK with the spleen hurting, and pizza stealing. Really. Just take a deep breath.}

*several deep panda breaths later, in the other room*

Wade, I'm so sorry. [It's alright. I'll pull back together eventually. You go ahead and finish up.] Maybe I shouldn't. I've been pretty bad. {Hugging people will make you feel better. Besides, the best way to make up for causing pain is to give comfort.} So maybe I should Hug Wade? [Actually, could you get Siryn to do that? I'd really appreciate a hug from Terry.] I don't know Wade, I can't go into comics the way you can come out. Maybe I can write you note saying an adorable baby panda asked her to hug you. [That could work. Hey, bend the tibia the other direction! I thought you were a biologist.] {I never took any anatomy classes, cut me some slack. You go ahead ABP, I'll take care of Wade.} OK. *ABP returns to the computer, out of earshot* [Why do I have a real bad feeling all of a sudden?] {Because you know I could take this opportunity to pay you back for all the suffering you inflicted on me in the past?} [Yeah, I think that's the reason.]

Um, well, Hugs for Rahne, Jamie, and Guido, because they all looked really cold, and an extra Hug for Rahne, because she seems so down. Hug for Ko-Rel, because it looks like Gamora really did kill her after all. Stupid Gamora, how could she - no, I'm not gonna get angry again. Hug for Moose. His dad is probably gonna die, he's in a government base being poked to make sure he isn't still hiding Carnage, and he thinks his favorite hero is to blame for all of it. And Hug for May, because she's just having a really lousy day. I better go see how Wade is. Maybe he'll accept my Hug after all. *hops away from computer, walks into other room* Wade! What happened! You look. . . back to normal. [Yup, Calvin did a bang-up job patching me back together, despite his ominous comments.] {Well, I just wanted to mess with you a bit, make you think I was gonna inflict pain.} [Ha! Yeah, that was really funny, how do I repay you? *draws gun from holster*] {Um, by not shooting me?} No more violence, or I'll beat you both up! {I think we better listen. I think his blood sugar level is messing with him.} [I hear ya. Try Sugar-Frosted Choco-Bombs. I'm outta here. 'Til next week, anyway.]

{So, should we make sure you eat before we do this from now on?} I think that might be a good idea, but really, there were just so many bad people in these comics, it wore on me. {I hear ya.}