Report From A Father/Son Field Trip

The most interesting thing I got up to while visiting my dad was the Cardinals' game we attended last Sunday. Depending on your attitude towards baseball vs. horticulture, you might consider my helping him plant 4 trees in his yard more interesting. As far as that goes, I wish we hadn't waited until the two hottest days I was there to get around to it, and I wish we could have turned his many dogs into a useful workforce. But that would set a precedent of encouraging digging, which would be bad. Though come to think of it, if they started digging, they might help him pull up that carpet he wants to replace faster.

Anyway, the baseball game. Neither of us had been to a game since 1999, when the Cards lost to the Astros in a game we departed in the 6th inning*. This time around they were facing the Pirates, which wasn't the reason my dad wanted to go. He was excited about the ceremony honoring Whitey Herzog being elected to the Hall of Fame. It was a nice presentation, as those things go. Dad took comfort that several of the players who showed up, ranging from a couple months to several years younger than him, looked really bad. Made him feel better about his appearance, so that was a nice, if unexpected, comedic value.

As to the game itself, the Cardinals kicked the Pirates' asses, 11-1, which really shouldn't be a surprise, but this team hasn't seemed as good as I feel it ought to be, and considering how the first two games of the series with the Astros that followed went, nothing can be taken for granted. We discussed how neither of us was terribly happy with Felipe Lopez at third base (though I'd rather he play there than Aaron Miles), and how we both think Yadier Molina needs more days off. They're 108 games into the season as I type this, and backup catcher Jason LaRue has only come to bat 63 times this season. If he's not going to be used, why have him around? I'm not as high on him as my dad is (I'm working off his stats, dad off radio broadcasts), but giving Molina a couple days off a week won't kill them, not the way he's hitting right now. Molina looks gassed, especially on the bases. He's never been fleet afoot, but watching him run the bases now - and there was plenty of opportunity as he collected 3 hits - reminded me of a Calvin and Hobbes' strip. They're having a "Who's Slowest" Race, and Hobbes claims to be so slow he's moving backwards. That's about where Molina is. I think management might want to petition the league to let Molina use a scooter to get around the bases. Or perhaps a rickshaw, pulled by bat boys. Can't hurt.

My confidence in Jeff Suppan starting was largely nonexistent. Fortunately this was the Pirates, a team so lacking in offensive talent even Jeff Suppan can strike out 4 batters in under 6 innings. Then he left, for reasons we were never clear on**. There was a runner on 3rd, but dad was pretty sure Suppan hurt himself stumbling on the mound. He did appear to stagger backwards, but the trainer never came out, so maybe LaRussa decided he wasn't giving Suppan the chance to self-destruct. Dad and I were both surprised to see the Cardinals not only try a couple of hit-and-runs, but even steal a base! Truly the spirit of Whitey Herzog had possessed LaRussa. Or, as I put it, Whitey talked to Tony and got him to eschew wine after the game in favor of a couple of beers beforehand. Whatever the reason, I like seeing those kinds of plays, even if they aren't statistically worth the risk. I'd rather the team lose due to over-aggression on the basepaths, rather than being too timid.

Of course, LaRussa played his usual reliever games. Trotted out five relievers to finish the last 3 and two-third innings. I'm still stunned he let both of his lefty relievers pitch to righthanded batters. He usually prefers limiting them to facing lefthanded batters. It worked out, though, so good job, I guess. I can't understand why he yanked Boggs so quickly in the 8th. They were up 6-1. Yes, Boggs surrendered that 1, but he can't be trusted with an 5-run lead? At least with all his switching around before the 9th, LaRue actually caught for an inning. Speaking as the guy in charge of our scorecard, I was not pleased trying to keep track of all that tomfoolery.

While I appreciate the Cards cruising to an easy win, the Pirates are not a fun team to watch. My dad was annoyed by the tentativeness of their outfielders, and in the second their RF lost a ball in the sun. He had sunglasses, but was wearing them upside-down on the back of his head, which seems impractical. In the third, the Cardinals had a promotion where fans in a certain section (or with a certain seat number) received some money for each Pirate stuck out. So as each Pirate came to the plate, his career strikeout total was shown on the board. Dad wasn't sure he approved of this, saying it seemed overly psychologically damaging or mean-spirited. Pirates' catcher Erik Kratz was batting at the time, so I pointed out seeing his .125 batting average posted on the scoreboard was probably more damaging than his 6 career strikeouts. For what it's worth, Suppan did manage to K one batter that inning.

The Pirates' pitchers were the worst of it. Not just because they're terrible, but because they're slow. Suppan's not good (though one might be fooled into believing so based on certain parts of this game), but he's fast. He gets the ball from Molina, steps on the rubber, agrees on a pitch, and throws it, about as quickly as the hitter allows. The Pirates' pitchers would get the ball, meander around the mound, stare at the catcher, keep shaking off signs, dragging things out forever. It's as though they believed if they stalled long enough, those opposing baserunners would magically disappear, they'd learn a new pitch, or gain 10 mph on their fastball. It's not happening, fellas. All delaying does is put your defense behind you asleep, which is bad. Might as well adopt the Max Power approach ("the wrong way, only faster!")

We didn't buy anything at the game besides the scorecard and a pencil. My dad offered to buy dinner, but I wasn't hungry, and the prices were more than I was comfortable with. It's a clever racket, though. They charge $4 for the peanuts, which are probably heavily salted, then charge at least $5 for a drink, after the peanuts dry you out. At least they have drinking fountains scattered about. We waited until after we left the stadium to eat. Pancakes at 11 p.m. are good stuff. There were some fans next to us who weren't put off by $8 beers, more power to them. They were having a great time, cheering, clapping, whistling, starting chants, practically commanding people to get on their feet at certain moments. I found it all very annoying, and it reminded me why I prefer to watch games at home, where I can pick who watches with me, and I have control over the volume. The whistling was really shrill; I came to loathe it. The hazards of sitting near the ultimate fan, especially one, as dad put it, who grew more ultimate with every beer (he and his buddies were stocking up at Last Call in the 7th).

The drive there and back brought forcibly home the fact both my parents are more aggressive than me behind the wheel. The gap between my mother and myself isn't nearly as large as the one between Pops and I, but it's there. He has some excuse about his ride getting better gas mileage above 70 (the highway speed limit), but I think once he's driving over 80, it's not about fuel efficiency anymore. Plus, he was weaving in his lane some the last 40 miles home, fatigue no doubt. When I pointed these things out 2 days later, he jibed that if I'd been driving, we'd still be in St. Louis. Which is true. His car is a manual transmission, and I don't know how to drive one of those, so yeah, it'd be slow going if I was behind the wheel. It was nice to not have to do all the driving, a reversal of the usual trend when I visit Alex.

* The game was really slow, and I had to be up at 6 for work the next morning. So we left after Cardinals' starter Juan Acevedo walked the opposing pitcher, which is never a good sign.

** Dad regretted not bringing a radio so we could listen to the broadcast for clarification, but I didn't mind as much. It's more fun to keep up my own running commentary.